B R Y C E think

Closing Time

2011-06-01T12:09:00.000-05:00

"You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here."

I'm leaving blogger for many reasons.

Blogger ate 4 posts and held them hostage for half a week.
Blogger has very limited back-door options.
I need a clean slate.
Blogger is a great intro tool to blogging. But it's time to put on the big boy pants at wordpress.

So, if you ever want to hear from me again, it won't be from this blog. I'm trying to start a regularly-updated, content-heavy blog on wordpress. Check it out below.

Go to my new blog: Sincerely Bryce.

Be sure and update your readers! Push this button to add my new blog to your reader!

Subscribe in a reader

Goodbye blogger. But not goodbye readers!

Bryce

-- Timeout Blogger! --

2011-05-17T13:00:00.001-05:00

All of this Blogger drama has been getting to me. Last week, four posts were almost deleted while blogger underwent 'maintence'!

I'm taking a short break. Besides, I've been thinking of changing the blog site to wordpress or posterous.

Until things get sorted out, chew on this - the first poem published by Piper in 1969 for $5.

In that land
Were some birds
And some grass
And very much dust
And a number of common folk
Wit a lot of simplicity
And wisdom;
So it was not unnatural
That they should expect
The grass to wither
And the birds to fall dead from the sky
When one of their friends,
Looking over his shoulder
Somehow like an ordinary man,
Said,
“Before Abraham was, I AM.”

LATE POST: Friday Music - Lecrae

2011-05-17T12:02:00.001-05:00

*This is from Friday, but blogger 'lost' my posts until now!*

Rehab - $5 on Amazon.com

I used to hate rap. There was no point to it. Then, I found Lecrae - a Christian rapper who occasionally outsells secular artists.

Lecrae's newest album, Rehab, is one of his best. Like his previous one, Rebel, Lecrae uses every lyric to pack in theological truths and ideas.

Some good tracks are "Killa" - about the destruction from lust; "Just Like You" - a look into identity; and the Star-Wars-quoting-fun "40 Deep".

Lecrae delivers another great album and continues to swim against rap's dark culture, creatig songs that edify and point people to Christ

Lyrics from "Just Like You"

I was created by God but I ain't wanna be like Him, I wanna be Him. The Jack Sparrow of my Carribean...
Then in steps Jesus. All men were created to lead, but we needed somebody to lead us. More than a teacher, but somebody to buy us back from the darkness, you can say He redeemed us.
Taught us that real leaders follow God, finish the work cause we on our job...

LATE POST: Mindless Monday Fun:Animal Edition

2011-05-17T12:01:00.002-05:00

*This was from yesterday, but blogger ate all of posts. Still funny though.*

Why are animal voiceovers so funny?

There's a whole series of these from BBC, which are surprisingly addicting:

Piper's Principles II: Is God Happy?

2011-05-17T08:53:00.000-05:00

Last week, I began to look at some major points in John Piper's book Desiring God. We looked at his book's foundation principle:

The chief end of man is to glorify God by enjoying Him forever. (p. 18)

This week, I want to address this question: If we are going to find joy and happiness in God, how do we know that God is happy? We've failed to find happiness in pleasures here, how do we know He won't fail us too?

----- | Sovereignty | -----

The answer lies in God's absolute sovereignty.

But the foundation of the happiness of God is the sovereignty of God: "Our God is in the heavens; he does all that he pleases." (Psalm 115:3). If God were not sovereign, if the world He made were out of control, frustrating His design again and again, God would not be happy. (p. 33)

The verse he mentions, and many others, teach the idea that God is in absolute control of every atom, event, and power in the universe. I love Piper's next point:

In the end, one must finally come to see that if there is a God in heaven, there is no such thing as mere coincidence, not even in the smallest affairs of life: "The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the Lord" (Proverbs 16:33). Not one sparrow "will fall to the ground without your Father's will" (Matthew 10:29). (p 37)

Knowing this, we can never think that we are in the wrong place, or are not where we should be. Every "chance" encounter stops being "chance" and starts being "divinely appointed." He knows where we are, and has us there for a reason! His sovereignty leaves no room for coincidences.

----- | The Unanswered Question | -----

The lingering question therefore is this: If God is sovereign, why do bad things happen? Why is there evil? Why can't he just stop all evil?

Some people would argue that God is not happy. They would point to the evil acts of men, natural disasters, and the fact that Satan is somehow "winning" here on earth. How could God be happy with the state of things? How could he be happy when bad things happen to his creation?

I have two answers for you.

First, Piper would point you to the death of Jesus Christ. A man was falsely accused, beaten, ridiculed, and murdered - yet this was God's will! Moreover, out of all the evilness, betrayal and darkness, God used these evil things to bring forth a way of grace to mankind. The gospel is a constant reminder that God sees evil and is saying "I know, I know... but just wait until you see what I am doing!" If we see anything in the Bible, it is the continuing theme of goodness coming from evil.

People lift their hand to rebel against the Most High only to find that their rebellion is unwitting service in the wonderful designs of God. (p 35)

The second answer comes is not from Piper, but from Lecrae, a Christian rapper. He takes a different approach on the problem of evil:

Look man, some people say that God ain't real because they don't see how a good God could exist with all this evil in the world. If God is real, then He should stop all this evil, cause He's all powerful right?

What is evil though? It's anything that's against God. It's anything morally bad or wrong. It's murder, rape, stealing, lying, cheating. But if we want God to stop evil, do we want Him to stop it all, or just a little bit of it? If He stops us from doing evil things, what about lying? Or what about all evil thoughts? I mean where do you stop? The murder level, the lying level, or the thinking level? If we want Him to stop evil, we gotta be consistent, we can't just pick and choose. That means you and I would be eliminated right? Because we think evil stuff. If that's true, we should be eliminated. But thanks be to God that Jesus stepped in to save us from our sin. Christ died for all evilness. Repent, and turn to Jesus. - lyrics from "Truth"

So, yes. We can all agree that evil things happen. But if we want God to just destroy all evildoers - we would all be destroyed!

God is sovereign, and He does as He pleases. He is utterly happy (wouldn't you be happy if your will could never be stopped?). And so, Piper argues, we have a sure foundation and source of happiness in this incredible Being.

Podcast: Jesus Plus Nothing Equals Everything

2011-05-11T09:52:00.001-05:00

This Sunday, we had a guest pastor give this sermon at the Village Church. It's a fantastic message on the centrality of the gospel:

Tulian Tchividian - Jesus Plus Nothing Equals Everything

[If this link doesn't work, just go to the main site, and find the one from May 7, 2011]

Tuesday News Roundup

2011-05-10T09:00:00.004-05:00

Two Muslim Imams Kicked Off Flight - Last Friday, after going through security and a secondary screening, a pilot in Tennessee refused to take off unless two high-ranking Muslims were removed from the plane. They were headed to North Carolina, ironically, to attend a conference on "prejudice against Muslims, or Islamaphobia." This is disgraceful and cannot happen in our country.

SlutWalk Marches - A police officer in Toronto sparked 'SlutWalk' marches in Toronto and Boston with one bad comment. The walks are a protest against blaming sexual assault victims for the crimes against them. What did he say?

"You know, I think we're beating around the bush here. I've been told I'm not supposed to say this - however, women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized". - Constable Michael Sanguinetti

Syria's Decline - Tanks v. protesters. No, not in Libya, but in a grim situation developing in Syria. Things are looking worse as one Syrian rights group claims 800 civilians have died in fighting...

Mindless Monday Fun: A Visit from the Sexy Sax Man

2011-05-09T08:00:00.002-05:00

Give this one a chance. Yeah, it's weird for the first 5 seconds.

But then, the hilarity ensues 12 seconds in.

Now, try not to sing this song all day.

A Primer on How to Drive in Dallas

2011-05-06T17:00:00.004-05:00

Yeah, he's from Dallas.

One of the biggest changes I've undergone in Texas was learning to drive in cities like Dallas. My first few days of hour-long commuting, I hated every driver in Dallas. After a week or so, things got easier. And it was then that I realized, I had become... one of them! So, here's a few pointers on how to drive in Dallas:

Signaling: Blinkers are a sign of weakness. If you use them, you will be cut off.
Tail-Gating: Is the traffic in front of you going too slow? Try this - get as close as you can to the car in front of you. Then, stay there. Congratulations. The car is now speeding up or getting out of your way.
Cell Phones: Driving on the highway is the BEST time to call that friend you've missed! Or, why not just text them? After all, it's easier
On-Ramps: When entering an on-ramp, press the accelerator to the floor. Studies have shown that entering a Dallas highway is about as hard as a jet launching from a carrier.
Bikes: It is a myth that bikers have the right of way on roads. Teach them a lesson by driving by them at a high speed. Same goes for pedestrians.
Brakes: You may have heard that 'easing' onto the brakes is the best way. But that is false. When traffic is slowing down, slam that brake pedal! The people behind you will just have to deal.
Trucks: Remember when you see the over sized, lift-kit fitted, dinosaur-sized truck - the driver is simply overcompensating. Take pity.
Speed Limit: Look at the speed limit sign. Follow this guide:

Right Lane Speed = Limit - 10,
Center Lane Speed = Limit +10,
Left Lane Speed is incalculable as it approaches infinity.

HOV Lane: What is that very left lane for? HOV who? I'm not sure what you've heard, but this is actually an extra lane for when traffic is stuck! Just hop in there anytime you feel like it!
Honking: It has been proven that Dallas drivers do not have the ability to hear car horns.
Highways: Someone dies every day on 635 and I-35. Do not be that person.
Stop Signs: You can go first by staring down the other drivers!
School Zones: The speed limit says 20 - but Dallas law requires you to go 10 mph OR 40 mph. Nowhere in-between.
Accidents: Did you just see an accident? Don't stop! Just slow down a lot so that others can look too.
Friendliness: When you wave someone to go in front of you, you've just marked yourself as a push-over to all the other drivers. They're going to go in as well.
Traffic Jams: Scientists are mystified by an anomaly in traffic jams: Time actually comes to a stop! They are currently trying to use this to slow down nuclear half-lives.
Car Maintenance: Why pay that auto store lots of cash, when duct tape will suffice?
Gas Prices: Search google for "syphoning tips".
Motorcycles: If you are riding a motorcycle in Dallas, you need to see a psychologist about your suicidal tendencies.
Pace: The best way to drive is to keep varying your speed. Speed up, slow down. This will keep the other drivers from predicting your path. And that means "winning".
Parking: 'Compacts only' is really a suggestion. Triple-park that beast!

Friday Music - Wye Oak

2011-05-06T10:00:00.001-05:00

Wye Oak is indie - very, very indie. Unlike the past few bands, they are not a worship band by any means.

Their debut album, Civilian just came out last month and it is fantastic! The band is made up of only two people - Andy Stack playing drums, keyboard and bass(!) while Jenn Wasner plays guitar and sings in a smoky voice - but they are still able to create a rich, unique sound.

Pitchfork has described them as an "earnest folk-influenced indie rock with touches of noise and dream pop." If this doesn't make sense, just listen to the song below.

These guys are going to be big, mark my words.

Check out "Fish" by Wye Oak:

Civilian - Wye Oak on Amazon - $5.00

"Christian Hedonism" - Sounds Dirty, Right?

2011-05-04T13:00:00.003-05:00

Can we have fun and not sin?

Christian Hedonism - this just sounds wrong. I mean, just look at this definition:
he·don·ism

1. (Philosophy) Ethics
a. the doctrine that moral value can be defined in terms of pleasure
b. the doctrine that the pursuit of pleasure is the highest good
2. the pursuit of pleasure as a matter of principle
3. indulgence in sensual pleasures

But, if asked, John Piper would call himself a Christian Hedonist. And, after reading half of Desiring God, I think I would too.

This sounds selfish, base, and utterly un-Christian. How could Piper base his book on this principle? Can a true Christian be a hedonist? Does he make it better by adding the word "Christian" in front of it?

So, let's try to understand how seeking our pleasure relates to following God. Do you think it can?

----- | Be Happy - The Bible Commands It? | -----

Today, Christians tend to see pursuing pleasure as a bad thing. "If it makes me happy, then it must be sin." So, we draw lines, and play things safe. But what if this hedonistic desire is good?

Piper argues that God wants us to be happy - the Bible is laced with hedonistic commands (p 25):

to "love mercy," not just do it (Micah 6:8)
to do "acts of mercy, with cheerfulness" (Romans 12:8)
to "joyfully" suffer loss in the service of prisoners (Hebrews 10:34)
to be a cheerful giver (2 Cor. 9:7)
to make our joy the joy of others (2 Cor. 2:3)
to tend the flock of God willingly and "eagerly" (1 Peter 5:2)
to keep watch over souls "with joy" (Hebrews 13:17)

And, Piper's favorite: "Delight yourself in the Lord" (Ps. 37:4). He even says:

Not to enjoy God is to dishonor Him. To say to Him that something else satisfies you more is the opposite of worship. It is sacrilege. (p. 22)

So, if I am not joyful when worshiping, am I wrong? Piper would say yes.

If this all sounds too harsh, Piper reaches a clear, concise definition pretty soon.

----- | Piper's Thesis | -----

Piper's main argument, and point is this: we are pleasure-seeking creatures, but will find our purest, most satisfying, never-ending happiness IN God. He quotes a great passage from CS Lewis:

If there lurks in most modern minds the notion that to desire our own good and earnestly to hope for the enjoyment of it is a bad thing, I submit that this notion has crept in from Kant and the Stoics and is no part of the Christian faith. Indeed, if we consider the unblushing promises of of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinte joy is offered us, like an ingorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased. (p. 20)

So, Piper finally rests on a clear definition of Christian Hedonism:

1. The longing to be happy is a universal human experience, and it is good, not sinful.
2. We should never try to deny or resist our longing to be happy, as though it were a bad impulse. Instead, we should seek to intensify this longing and nourish it with whatever will provide the deepest and most enduring satisfaction.
3. The deepest and most enduring happiness is found only in God. Not from God, but in God.
4. The happiness we find in God reaches its consummation when it is shared with others in the manifold ways of love.
5. To the extent that we try to abandon the pursuit of our own pleasure, we fail to honor God and love people. Or, to put it positively: The pursuit of pleasure is a necessary part of all worship and virtue. That is:
The chief end of man is to glorify God by enjoying Him forver. (p28)

Would you agree with him? In glorifying God, are we not the happiest?

If there is disagreement, Piper starts with this and unpacks it over 300 pages. Give him a chance.

Next week - we'll look at the question "Is God Happy?"

"Take Heart!" - A Reminder

2011-05-03T16:40:00.000-05:00

How easily I forget the answer to all of my troubles. Today, I was reminded of a simple, but powerful promise by Jesus:

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” - John 16:33

He promises peace in Himself! Not a peace to come, or a peace from our 'good behavior'. No, we can "take heart" in the fact that our peace is already secure - He has overcome! It's done.

This Hillsong tune fleshes this out in a great way, meeting each of our problems with a trait of God:

[Chorus at 3:50]

All our troubles, and all our tears,
God our Hope, He has overcome!

All our failure, and all our fear,
God our Love, He has overcome!

All our heartache, and all our pain,
God our Healer, He has overcome!

All our burdens, and all our shame,
God our Freedom, He has overcome!

God our Justice,
God our Grace,
God our Freedom,
He has overcome!

God our Refuge,
God our Strength,
God is with us,
He has overcome!

(lyrics from: http://www.elyrics.net/read/h/hillsong-united-lyrics/take-heart-lyrics.html)

Mindless Monday Fun: My Name is John Daker...

2011-05-02T16:35:00.000-05:00

A little late, but this video is hilarious any time of the day:

"My Name is John Daker"

We sang this song in church on Easter, and this video is all I could think about!!

Friday Music - Gungor

2011-04-29T08:00:00.006-05:00

Gungor - Beautiful Things

$5.00 from Amazon.com during April.

"Just as the band is about far more than one person, this album is about a God so great and grand that our response should be deep, creative, and passionate. In Beautiful Things, Gungor has achieved just that." - gungormusic.com

Probably my favorite CD ever. Intimately deep, fantastic musically, Beautiful Things achieves the goal of instilling a yearning for God.

Intro - Piper's Principles (Working Title!)

2011-04-28T09:00:00.020-05:00

Desiring God has been turning my world upside down.

I've been reading through it during April with Piper's church. Along the way, he has been posting discussion interviews about the book. Sadly, I have missed all of those! But, I'm hoping they're stored away somewhere around the internets.

I am going to be sharing some sweet little nuggets from his book. Some may be small, some may be way too deep to even try to explain on a blog, but I'm still going for it. I'm planning to write a post for each chapter starting next week. Let's say, on Thursdays. We'll call the posts Piper's Principles. Or maybe, "Desiring God" Goodies.

I'll work on the title. But May 5th will be the start. It's an amazing book, and I'm excited to share some thoughts!

----- | | | -----

As a teaser, here's a big idea I've been wrestling with:

Do you want God, or do you want His gifts? Did you receive Jesus Christ from guilt and shame, or is He your Treasure? Do you believe that there is unending delight and joy in serving God and loving others?

Could it be that today the most straightforward biblical command for conversion is not, "Believe in the Lord," but, "Delight yourself in the Lord?" - Piper

In Support of Artists, not Thieves

2011-04-27T17:00:00.020-05:00

Efterklang is mad at Piraters.

What is stealing?

I walk into a store. There is that new Mumford and Sons CD sitting on the shelf. Or maybe for you, it's Lady Gaga's new album. Whatever. I glance around, no one is looking. No cameras. So, I take that CD and put it in my jacket pocket. Then, I walk out of the store...

We would all agree that this is stealing, right? What about this:

I get on my computer. I open up Limewire. I download Mumford and Sons' new CD.

It is strange to think that this does not seem like stealing to me or my peers. But, the common thread here is that I took a good without paying for it - that is, common theivery.

"But Bryce, you didn't put the CD on Limewire. Someone else did. You're just copying some digital files!"

Ok, so I am copying stolen items from a thief.

By pirating music, you support thieves, not artists.

----- | Who Buys Music? | -----

During college, I had a music-freak friend. He was always talking about bands I had never (and still haven't) heard of. He was starting to write music, and loved playing his favorite bands' songs.

One day, he told me something shocking - he had purchased all of his 20 GB+ library of music.

What?! Who does that anymore? We have torrents and limewires and so many other ways to obtain a digital file. We don't even think twice anymore about downloading music.

But, he challenged me to do just that. Instead of using the 'stealing argument', he was passionate about the converse idea: he wanted to support his artists!

By buying music, you are supporting good artists. (They are good to me, or else I wouldn't buy them!) Can you really say you are Lady Gaga's / Mumford and Sons / U2's biggest fan if you've never actually bought any of their music? Don't artists we enjoy deserve our money? Shouldn't we want to support them so they can do things like buy food, pay their bills, and make more good music?

----- | A Challenge | -----

1. Stop pirating music. If you steal music, you do not support that artist or any message they promote. No one who loves music will pirate music.

2. Delete all music you do not own. Yeah, this one's gonna hurt. But only in the beginning. Then, you will have to become music-savvy. Read reviews, listen to clips, etc, before buying (supporting) an artist. Soon, you'll have a small collection of music that you actually like and listen to.

3. Buy music. I have around 15 GB of music. I bought all of it. Is that tough to do? Yes! I have a section of budget for music. I rigorously review bands before I buy their music. It's tough, and it costs me something. But, it's worth it.

Efterklang is happy that you buy music.

Support your favorite artists. Buy their music. Help them continue to make more good music and continue to spread their message. Pirating is putting good artists out of business, and instead supports thieves.

Mindless Monday Fun

2011-04-25T08:00:00.004-05:00

Two things to make Monday fly by:

The Opposite of Peanuts? - 3eanuts - This is a fantastic idea:

"Charles Schulz's Peanuts comics often conceal the existential despair of their world with a closing joke at the characters' expense. With the last panel omitted, despair pervades all."

Two of my favorites:

"To all the non-believers!!" - Bart Scott Post-Game Interview

You don't really need much background here. Bart Scott is an infamously emotional interviewer. This takes place just after the underdog Jets beat the Patriots. There's some good quotes here!

Yes Monday, now I am ready to take you on.

Friday Music - Hillsong United "Aftermath"

2011-04-22T13:57:00.000-05:00

Aftermath - $8.99 on Amazon.com

I've always loved Hillsong. Who doesn't?

Still, in their older albums, I was constantly skipping songs. But in this new one, every track is phenomenal. You will hear the gospel thirteen times.

My favorite track:

The INTJ Mind & My Achilles' Heel

2011-04-22T12:44:00.000-05:00

I recently found this site which describes meyers-briggs personality types very well -

http://typelogic.com/intj.html

As an INTJ, I am very... misunderstood. However, I think this paragraph describes me very well.

INTJs are idea people. Anything is possible; everything is negotiable. Whatever the outer circumstances, INTJs are ever perceiving inner pattern-forms and using real-world materials to operationalize them. Others may see what is and wonder why; INTJs see what might be and say "Why not?!" Paradoxes, antinomies, and other contradictory phenomena aptly express these intuitors' amusement at those whom they feel may be taking a particular view of reality too seriously. INTJs enjoy developing unique solutions to complex problems.

As good as this is, there is a downside to being an INTJ.

Personal relationships, particularly romantic ones, can be the INTJ's Achilles heel. While they are capable of caring deeply for others (usually a select few), and are willing to spend a great deal of time and effort on a relationship, the knowledge and self-confidence that make them so successful in other areas can suddenly abandon or mislead them in interpersonal situations.

This happens in part because many INTJs do not readily grasp the social rituals; for instance, they tend to have little patience and less understanding of such things as small talk and flirtation (which most types consider half the fun of a relationship). To complicate matters, INTJs are usually extremely private people, and can often be naturally impassive as well, which makes them easy to misread and misunderstand. Perhaps the most fundamental problem, however, is that INTJs really want people to make sense. :-) This sometimes results in a peculiar naivete', paralleling that of many Fs -- only instead of expecting inexhaustible affection and empathy from a romantic relationship, the INTJ will expect inexhaustible reasonability and directness.

Probably the strongest INTJ assets in the interpersonal area are their intuitive abilities and their willingness to "work at" a relationship. Although as Ts they do not always have the kind of natural empathy that many Fs do, the Intuitive function can often act as a good substitute by synthesizing the probable meanings behind such things as tone of voice, turn of phrase, and facial expression. This ability can then be honed and directed by consistent, repeated efforts to understand and support those they care about, and those relationships which ultimately do become established with an INTJ tend to be characterized by their robustness, stability, and good communications.

Well, this explains a lot! I encourage you to check out your personality type, it will help you in many ways.

Jesus Switched Our Cups

2011-04-22T08:00:00.004-05:00

Last year, in Israel, I was able to experience one of the most moving sermons I've ever heard. I think about it every time I take communion, when I hear the gospel, when I think of the Garden of Gethsemane. The following is my recap of the talk by Ross Strader, of Bethel Bible Church in Tyler, TX.

----- | Jesus' Anguish | -----

This talk was given on our Israel trip in the traditional Garden of Gethsemane:

"The Matthew 26 account is the darkest, most horrific part of the Bible." Ross

Before the day of his crucifixion, Jesus prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane. Look at His state here -

And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground. Luke 22:44

Then he said to them, “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.” Matthew 26:38

Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” Matthew 26:39

Why was Jesus in so much anguish? Was it because He feared the path before Him? Or was it something else?

----- | The Cup | -----

What is this 'cup' that Jesus refers to? We may think that it was his impending crucifixion. I believe it is referring instead to another cup numerously referenced in the Bible.

Job 21: 20 - Let their own eyes see their destruction; let them drink the cup of the wrath of the Almighty.

Jeremiah 25:15 - This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, said to me: “Take from my hand this cup filled with the wine of my wrath and make all the nations to whom I send you drink it.

Revelation 14:10 - they, too, will drink the wine of God’s fury, which has been poured full strength into the cup of his wrath. They will be tormented with burning sulfur in the presence of the holy angels and of the Lamb.

Habakkuk 2:16 - You will be filled with shame instead of glory. Now it is your turn! Drink and let your nakedness be exposed! The cup from the LORD’s right hand is coming around to you, and disgrace will cover your glory.

Psalm 58:7 - In the hand of the LORD is a cup full of foaming wine mixed with spices; he pours it out, and all the wicked of the earth drink it down to its very dregs.

So you tell me, what cup was Jesus asking God to take away?

Jesus was about to drink the cup that we deserve, that I deserve - the cup of God's wrath. He was about to take on, in His body, the wickedness of the world. He did not just experience our sins, the Bible says he BECAME them. He who knew no sin, became sin (2 Cor. 5:21). He bore our sins, in His body, on the cross (1 Peter 2:24). He was about to experience the cup of God's wrath.

From these verses, we can begin to imagine what exactly that cup was. The cup of wrath is described in Revelation for those doomed to hell (Rev. 14:10). Imagine the infinite wrath of God for every murder, rape, broken heart, war, death, disease, injury, lie, genocide, suicide bombing, or rebellion. This is the cup that Jesus drank.

----- | Jesus Switched our Cups | -----

At this time in the talk, we took communion. We contemplated how deeply painful this cup of wrath must have been. Enough for Jesus to sweat blood. And then, just before we drank from the cup, Ross finished the story.

The cup we drink from today is a cup of grace. The grape juice we drink each week is a reminder. We were supposed to drink from the cup of wrath. We deserve it.

But Jesus switched our cups. He drank the cup of God's wrath, punishment unimaginable, and gave us His cup of grace.

Isaiah 53:6 - We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to our own way; and the LORD has laid on Him the iniquity of us all.

By accepting Jesus as Lord, we are seen as holy and righteous before God.

Romans 4:24 - ...but also for us, to whom God will credit righteousness—for us who believe in him who raised Jesus our Lord from the dead. He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.

During Good Friday, remember what Jesus did for you. Remember the pain, the anguish, the loneliness not just from the cross, but also from the wrath for our sinful actions today.

And Sunday, let us be joyful of the cup we now have!

Paleo Diet for Social Media Specifics!

2011-04-21T09:00:00.005-05:00

A couple of days ago, I began to wonder what a Social Media Paleo Diet would look like. Check it out here.

Keeping those goals in mind, I think my time on social media should be really, really limited. There shouldn't be enough time to just "browse around". It should be more like a bathroom trip - get in, get out.

This is what I'm thinking:

Twitter - can check once per day - 10 mins.
Facebook - can check twice per week - 15 mins each.
Google Reader - can check once per day - 10 mins
Blogger - can use any time as I want (writing new blogs)
News Sites - can check twice per day for 5 minutes.

I've also been thinking about limiting time for video games and things like Netflix. I could see these consuming all of my time if I'm not online... As for now, these are still being thought over.

As the month goes on, I'm hoping to shorten these even more!

Do these seem too long or short? Are there other sites you visit? Make up your own times!

After all, we're not cavemen.

----- | Preparation | -----

To prepare, I'm going to do a few things.

1. Lists. I'm going to make lists on facebook and twitter for the people I actually care about. That way, I don't have to surf through everything and can still see how my friends are doing. I may even make a few for quotes, celebrities, leaders, etc.

2. Removing all comfortability. When I open up my internet browser, boom, facebook is just a click away through a link. Same thing on my phone - tweetdeck is in the center of my phone. So, I'm going to hide these away. Goodbye links and goodbye easy access to apps.

3. Pray. This experience will be tough. My only prayer during this time is this: "Lord, be my treasure. Let me see how I am simply trying to fill a gap by doing all this social media junk. Let me find all my satisfaction only in you."

So, anybody else interested? May is just around the corner...

The Paleo Diet for Social Media.

2011-04-19T17:17:00.000-05:00

During April, I was challenged to try the Paleo diet. Basically, the diet only allows you to eat what a caveman could eat - fresh fruit, meat, vegetables, nuts, eggs. No bread, sweets or even milk!

And I failed miserably.

Okay, it wasn't a total loss. The bigger goal in doing the diet was to watch what I was eating, and not just eat the same junk I've been eating since I was a sugar-hungry kid. So, I did learn about some healthy foods by branching out, as well as how to resist the call of sugar.

----- | | | -----

While I was doing this, I began to wonder, "What if I applied these same principles elsewhere?" I mean, those 'paleo' men seemed to live pretty well without Dr. Pepper or bread. What else could I do without? Where else am I losing discipline?

One of the biggest areas for me is the internet. I can get into this (sick) cycle of checking Facebook, reading there for a while, then hopping to Twitter to read all of the updates, then heading to Google Reader, catching up on some blogs, use Google Explore, check CNN, FOX News... then back to Facebook. What?! Where did that hour just go? Just like this:

Somehow this social media / connecting thing has become an idol in my life. Even if I'm just surfing "Christian" blogs and John Piper's twitter feed, I can still waste time trying to feel 'connected'. It's consuming, it's an idol. There is a void of lonliness which social media tries to fill, but it is always lacking. So I keep coming back.

----- | | | -----

So, I thought, "What if there was a Social Media Paleo Diet?" What would it look like?

I don't think all social media should be cut out, but it definitely needs it's boundaries. Strict ones. The goal isn't to become absent online.

The goals would be to:

1. Limit time in social media to get to important things. There are good, beneficial uses for social media. But, I rarely get to them b/c I stop and watch another "Friday" remix or a laughing baby.

2. Get more involved with real relationships. A big goal would be to build more real community. Write a letter. Volunteer. Grab some coffee with a friend. Start a regularly-meeting group. At the very least - stop checking twitter while ten of us are sitting together.

3. Remove Social Media's power over me. The final goal would be to begin to realize just how hooked I am to status updates, links, and tweets. I believe it has more power over me than I think. It's a very deceptive idol, this desire to be 'connected.'

Sound interesting? I'm going to think more on what it would specifically look like. But, I'm shooting for starting this in May.

We do not do discipline because we are strong, but because we are incredibly weak.

April: The Paleo Diet (Or, Say Goodbye to the Captain)

2011-03-30T17:00:00.001-05:00

The second month-long challenge for April is the Paleo Diet. Inspired by Andrew Bacon's Challenge, I decided to try to only eat what is on the Paleo Diet (basically what a caveman could eat), for the month of April. On the diet, you can only eat: Lean meats, Fresh fruits, Vegetables, Eggs, & Nuts. No processed foods, no dairy, no cereal.

Now, I have heard a lot of things from both sides about this diet. Some say that the lack of carbs is just plain stupid, while others (especially some friends who are now in the military) have right up there next to the gospel.

Here's my take: I have been doing a 'practice run' this week. I've mostly been eating fruit for breakfast and lunch and meat and vegetables for din-din. I haven't really been swayed either way until yesterday. I've been slowly getting over the holidays (yeah, the ones in December), and finally have been running regularly for like two weeks. I've been trying some longer runs (2.5 miles, if that counts as 'long'). Anyways, the point is this: I had been running the 2.5 mile loop in about 23-24 minutes. That's like a 10 min mile. But, yesterday, I finished it in 19:50! I cut off four minutes of time since last thursday?! How did I go from a 10 minute mile to under 9 mins?

Maybe I've just been getting used to running, but I am leaning towards the fact I've been eating healthier.

But we'll see how April goes. Now I just have to kill my addiction to the Captain...

I am changing a few of the rules though.

1. Milk in protein shakes is allowed. Like Andrew, I'm not trying to lose weight, but gain some muscle.
2. Yogurt is allowed. Hopefully the Greek kind, with way more protein and less sugar.
3. Coffee after Easter. I've given it up for lent.
4. Finally, 'fresh' fruits and veggies are expensive - I'm allowing canned/frozen ones. Just gotta check that salt/sugar content.
5. Peanut Butter. I know cavemen didn't have any... but that's their problem.

There's a good chance I'm going to break some rules, but it's still gonna be an interesting month! Probably have some updates later.

April: Read Through Desiring God with me and Piper

2011-03-30T12:48:00.000-05:00

That's right! You can read Desiring God AND hear discussions with the brilliant author himself - John Piper!

During April, Bethlehem College and Seminary is sponsoring the event. Every Thursday in April, there will be a live webcast (and archived version if you miss it) at John Piper's blog .

I'm pretty excited - I've actually never read the book, but I have started it a few times. Now, I have a little extra motivation. I'll be trying to post updates about some topics, but I think there'll be way too much to discuss... we'll see.

So, join in, even if you've already read it!

The schedule is as follows:

Schedule
12pm EST – Live
12pm CST – Rebroadcast
12pm MST – Rebroadcast
12pm PST – Rebroadcast

March 31

Chapter 1 – “The Happiness of God: The Foundation for Christian Hedonism”
Chapter 2 – “Conversion: The Creation of a Christian Hedonist”

April 7

Chapter 3 – “Worship: The Feast of Christian Hedonism”
Chapter 4 – “Love: The Labor of Christian Hedonism”

April 14

Break (The Gospel Coalition 2011 National Conference)

April 21

Chapter 5 – “Scripture: Kindling for Christian Hedonism”
Chapter 6 – “Prayer: The Power of Christian Hedonism”

April 28

Chapter 7 – “Money: The Currency of Christian Hedonism”
Chapter 8 – “Marriage: A Matrix for Christian Hedonism”

May 5

Chapter 9 – “Missions: The Battle Cry of Christian Hedonism”
Chapter 10 – “Suffering: The Sacrifice of Christian Hedonism”

CRASH (Part VI): A Blessing

2011-03-24T21:00:00.010-05:00

(So, maybe that last post was a little misleading. I mean, what was the 'answer'? Should I keep going on with medicine?! Well, you're in luck, because that will be answered now.)

So, let's look at what just happened. It started with some doubts I had for a long time which finally surfaced - "Do I really want to be doing this?", "Is medicine my passion?", "Have I just been going along this whole time?" Then, things got bad. I was going crazy trying to roll up my sleeves and figure this out alone. When that didn't work, I talked with my community, and finally, God.

In this struggle, the real problem was unearthed: I was finding too much of my identity in what I did. When I didn't know what I would be doing career-wise, I crumbled away. Too much of my satisfaction was found in what I was doing. My whole self was relying on this pillar, and that pillar was crushed.

Who do I believe did this crushing? Well, I believe that God did. Why would a good God do that?

I'll show you.

-----| | |-----

(Note: You should know that everything in this series happened in a span of five days. Two days after things finally settled our story picks up.)

I had a phone meeting with a certain medical school to discuss last year's application. (The meeting was set before these doubts showed up.) I called the school and was put on hold. Then, I realized I was actually going to be talking with the Dean of Admissions! No pressure, right?

But then something amazing happened. As I talked with him through my application, we started to click. Once he found out that I was re-applying as a Texas resident, he encouraged me! Moreover, he told me that we should keep in touch and that he would be willing to look over my application before I sent it off! The icing on the cake was this - he told me to let him know when I sent it off, and that he would go and look for it! How as this happening?! This was the Dean of Admissions!

Now, I didn't go into this conversation trying to butter anybody up or even 'get my name out there.' Still, something amazing had happened. If it wasn't me, how did this happen? Maybe the dean was just a nice guy, but I believe God had all of this planned out.

He had just crushed my dependency for satisfaction in myself and my career, and now, 48 hours later, He was blessing me beyond belief!

(FYI to answer all those wondering - I'm going to continue with medicine because I think God is clearing that way for me. But, unlike before, it's on the table as an option, not a "known". If I feel lead somewhere else, I'm ready to drop it. But, like I said, right now it seems as if God has blessed me here.)

-----| | |-----

And so, that's the big, final lesson I learned from all of this. God wants to crush those areas we cling to, and then bless us. He brought me through this time of struggle because He loves me as a son:

“My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
because the Lord disciplines the one he loves,
and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.”
Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father? -- Hebrews 12:5-7

He found an area of my life where I was shutting Him out, so He pushed me a little, and I fell apart. Then, once I realized my absolute need and dependency on Him in this area, He brought a little of His kingdom here on earth - a blessing. Jesus told us:

“Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!" -- Matthew 7:9-11

Now, I'm not promising you anything. God isn't going to bless us all with corvettes and mansions. He only works according to His will (which, could include corvettes and mansions I guess).

If there are areas of your life where you are pushing God out - beware! He will find them, and He will crush them. Not because He isn't good, but because He loves us.

We read that one day, "every knee will bow. . . every tongue will acknowledge God." So, by choosing to follow His ways now, we're just getting a head start on the inevitable. We can choose to acknowledge Him and His ways now, and be a part of His kingdom now; or we could wait it out, and miss out on all the goodness God desires to bring to his people! Find those places where we are relying on ourselves and destroy them!

So this is the choice we're left with: Be crushed now or later. Become an adopted son and see God's kingdom realized here, or continue to be a 'god', building pillars that can't support the weight.

Your choice - for now.

CRaSH is a short series of lessons learned from a time of deep struggle in my life. View all posts here.

CRASH (Part V): An Answer!

2011-03-22T21:00:00.000-05:00

"What am I living for?"

This has been a question I've wrestled with for months here in Dallas. With a 9-5 job, I suddenly had all of this time on my hands. I could come home, relax, and . . . do what? The achiever in me thought of grand goals such as reading every book I own, or getting a second job. The gamer in me just wanted to sit inside and play Xbox. I had worked and fought for free time in college, and now, I had way more than I could ever dream of.

Then, all of this stuff came up about my career path. I had tried to solve things myself - that didn't go well. Then, I talked it through with some of my community; and I was beginning to get a few answers.

----- | | | -----

My friend and I had decided that this experience may be less about what my future career would exactly be. It was more about this: I was holding on too tightly to this path. There have been so many times when I knew I would've followed God anywhere He told me to go; but in the back of my mind I thought,"...but I'm still going to medical school, right?" God owed me this, right?

Of course not! And so, I gained some good wisdom from that talk - I was most definitely clutching this dream too tightly - so, my mindset went from a fist, to an open palm, as if to say "Do with me as You will."

But this was not the root of the problem. The root was deeper.

----- | | | -----

You see, in all of this, I was avoiding the one relationship which could actually help - God. Oh sure, I prayed a lot during this time, but I wanted an immediate answer. Instead, I was lead into this time of suffering and struggling without an answer to my prayers. But, I think He wanted it that way.

The real answer came after I had tried everything else. I was contemplating all these events, and praying with the Lord again. And finally, something was brought to my mind - the real problem.

The real problem went all the way back to my identity. Imagine, if you will, that my entire identity was a 'house.' In it, my strengths and weaknesses, purpose and direction, likes and dislikes, etc. At the bottom, was the foundation, holding everything else up.

Sounds good, right? What God showed me was another column, underneath that whole 'house', struggling to support the entire thing. In that column was where I found my true satisfaction, purpose, direction - and that was in my career and the things that I can do. That column propped up everything. And that's what all of this was about - that pillar was crumbling, and so the entire house was falling! Without knowing exactly what I would be doing, (I mean, I just had a little doubt about how passionate I am!) the entire thing fell.

And so, the answer was this: My satisfaction, my joy and purpose will never be satisfied by a career. I will never be satisfied by how much I can do or get done. What I do is not meant to support the rest of me - it can't! And, it didn't - it fell apart when things got tough.

----- | | | -----

So, I want to touch on the importance of identity. Specifically, what our foundation is. If everything else were to fall apart, what would we have left? Our money? A spouse? A son or daughter? Creativity? Something we've done? Our body? What would we try to find our hope in?

Well, here's a newsflash - whatever we put there is going to eventually fail! We will lose money, get old, lose a loved one, become disabled. . . Anything and everything we fall back on will fail. (Just ask Brett Favre).

Apparently, my faith has been in my performance for a long time, and I had built up a nice pillar for my career. And then, with a little stress, it just crumbled away this week. A very weak foundation, indeed.

I submit that we must put our full trust and faith in something else. That is, someone else: Jesus Christ. The bible says that He loved us, even in our rebellion; He came to bring us to the Truth, despite all the world's lies; and He died and rose again, allowing us to come into a relationship with a true Foundation. It is only in Him, the eternal lover of mankind, who calls us to Him, where I can put my true faith and trust.

Because everything else will fail.

----- | | | -----

"Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be likea foolish man who built his house on the sand. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it." - Mathew 7:24-28

(Don't fret, there is one last lesson coming in this series!)

CRaSH is a short series of lessons learned from a time of deep struggle in my life. View all posts here.

C.R.a.S.H. (Part IV): Community

2011-03-17T08:00:00.011-05:00

"It is true, of course, that what is an unspeakable gift of God for the lonely individual is easily disregarded and trodden under foot by those who have the gift every day. It is easily forgotten that the fellowship of Christian brethren is a gift of grace, a gift of the Kingdom of God that any day may be taken from us, that the time that still separates us from utter loneliness may be brief indeed... It is grace, nothing but grace, that we are allowed to live in community with Christian brethren."
- Dietrich Bonhoeffer (Life Together)

If you remember, I was in a desperate place. I had realized how many hidden doubts and fears I was keeping. When these came to the surface, there were just too many. I couldn't handle it, I couldn't begin to process them all. Like I said before, things were really going downhill. . .

I had to talk with someone besides myself. I had literally thought and worried myself into a corner. There was nothing else I could do.

So, the next place I turned to was my community.

----- | | | -----

A good community is very healthy. I stress good because not all friends and fellowship are good. A good community should:

Allow members to freely express doubts, fears and challenges.
Confess with each other.
Point each other back to biblical truths and eradicate lies the members believe.
Serve each other
Challenge each other to live out what they believe.
Commit themselves to each other's growth.
Have dance parties together.

For Christians, we need to find other Christians. Why? Because other Christians understand that we are both mere rebels before a holy God. In fact, advice given from a non-Biblical perspective may hurt us more.

Bonhoeffer explains this very well:

"The most experienced psychologist or observer of human nature knows infinitely less of the human heart than the simplest Christian who lives beneath the Cross of Jesus. The greatest psychological insight, ability, and experience cannot grasp this one thing: what sin is. Worldly wisdom knows what distress and weakness and failure are, but it does not know the godlessness of man. And so it also does not know that man is destroyed only by his sin and can be healed only by forgiveness. Only the Christian knows this. In the presence of a psychiatrist I can only be a sick man; in the presence of a Christian brother I can dare to be a sinner. The psychiatrist must first search my heart and yet he never plumbs its ultimate depth. The Christian brother knows when I come to him: here is a sinner like myself, a godless man who wants to confess and yearns for God’s forgiveness. The psychiatrist views me as if there were no God. The brother views me as I am before the judging and merciful God in the Cross of Jesus Christ." - Dietrich Bonhoeffer (Life Together)

Community is under-appreciated. But, it really is a blessing when worked out properly. I highly recommend Life Together by Dietrich Bonhoeffer. The man has some practical ways to live out deep, thoelogical truths. Very good stuff for any community.

----- | | | -----

A year ago, in the Forge, I had the 'dream-team' community. There were twenty-four of us, dedicated to each other, teaching, challenging, inspiring, and rebuking one another. Twenty-three other solid rocks for when one of us was not so solid.

Today, my community is much smaller, but still effective.

So, after two days of struggling with all of this alone, I finally sent out a few emails and made a few phone calls. I met up with a really close friend. I spilled out all of these crazy thoughts and doubts and fears I had been steeped in. And, honestly, being vulnerable never felt so good.

And here's the amazing thing. My friend didn't need to give me an answer from some deep theological proof. In fact, half of the healing was in his listening. As I sorted everything out in my mind to explain things, just talking about them made many things clearer.

When we did talk, it was about simple truths and promises in the Bible. Nothing deep. I had heard what he told me before, but now I really heard them. The words really were a Rock I was clinging to. Like Psalm 40 says: "He set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand."

After our conversation, I talked with others in my close community. And slowly, more answers came.

So, wherever you are, find a community. Not only will you need it one day, but you can bless those who are currently struggling. A community is one of the best investments you could make. Find one, or start making one.

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. -- Hebrews 10:24-25

My C.R.a.S.H. (Part III): Downhill

2011-03-15T17:05:00.002-05:00

Continuing the story . . .

After the traumatic car ride home, I was scrambling for some solid ground. I was in a storm of doubts, fears and insecurities. . .

They raced through my mind - "If medicine isn't my passion, then what is? Have I been going the wrong way all along? If not medicine, then what? I need to know! What should I do? Where should I go?"

But there was also another factor: my pride. I had come all this way, tried so hard - could I just walk away? What would people think? I had invested a lot here, and didn't know if I could let myself turn back.

In times like these, what we rely on comes to the surface. Where do we go? Where do we turn?

----- | | | -----

Well, the first place that I went was: myself.

Hours after 'the realization,' I already had a plan. It was so simple - if I wasn't passionate about medicine, then all I had to do was find something that lined up with the passions I knew.

The answer? Computers.

Yes, I decided I was going into computer programming - you know, learning code and stuff. I based this on my passions - I knew I enjoyed solving problems and creating systems. Plus, a less strenuous job would allow me to be more involved in a church, community, etc. That was it - all my fears were solved.

It sounded so good. That night, I even talked it through with my parents. I remember saying things like, "I think I just ended up in the wrong field. The passions that led me towards medicine overlap with the ones in programming."

I went to work the next morning, decided on my new path. But as the day went on, I went back and forth between continuing to medicine and switching to Comp Sci. My head was a swamp of thoughts and it had been working overtime since my passions came into question. I was still stuck.

----- | | | -----

There was a major problem in my thinking. And I couldn't see it.

My head was spinning from a torrent of hidden doubts and fears. I had simply latched onto a plan because at least it was some direction. I was not thinking clearly at all. I couldn't trust myself; I was distressed, and irrational. So how could I help myself?

The tough answer was: I couldn't.

When things came crashing down, the first thing I tried to do was fix it all myself. My lesson here was that not every problem can be conquered alone. And a lot of problems shouldn't be. It's easy to see now, but I easily forget this in the midst of things.

So, I hadn't fixed anything alone. In fact, things were looking worse! All of those fears just kept circling. I was flip-flopping between two career paths. And now I couldn't even trust my own mind!

It was

all

spiralling

downhill. . .

I realized I could not save myself. So, I turned to something else. Something I learned to treasure during the Forge. . .

but that's for the next post.

CRaSH is a short series of lessons learned from a time of deep struggle in my life. View all posts here.

My C.R.a.S.H. (Part II): A Hidden Problem

2011-03-11T17:00:00.002-06:00

"There is meaning in every journey that is unknown to the traveler."
— Dietrich Bonhoeffer

I'm always amazed how quickly our lives can go from peaceful to painful. A lot can change in an instant. This is how this 'crash' began:

Things were spectacular. It was a bright, Sunday afternoon and I was riding home to Dallas. That weekend, I had met with the majority of my Forge class to celebrate and send off two of us going into the Army. I got to see many faces and catch up with these uber-close friends. That Sunday morning, we had a hearty breakfast together, and just enjoyed each other's company fully.

So, as I rode home, I was still surfing on the weekend's high. And then, out of my empty, blissful little mind comes the thought: "I am not passionate about medicine." What?! Where did that come from?!

To describe exactly what happened in my mind just then is what I imagine a ship's "Full Stop" would be. (You've seen Titanic, right?) "Stop the engines!" , "shut 'er down!" That's what happened to my brain.

But, the most devastating part was that I knew it was true. "I'm not passionate about medicine," I thought.

----- | | | -----

Now, looking back, I know where this thought came from. You see, it wasn't the first time it had been through my mind. It wasn't even the second, third, or tenth...

This was a doubt I had for years. It had battered me as soon as I began to pursue a career in medicine. And it wasn't the only one. But, each time a doubt came up, I simply hid it. I banished it from my thoughts. Then, I hid it from people I talked with, and even over-sold my confidence in going into medicine -"Out of sight, out of mind."

And so, this is the first thing I learned from this ordeal: Hiding fears, doubts or insecurities from yourself or others is simply stupid.

Why?

These problems and insecurities never go away. I pushed this fear down for 3 years! Yet, after all this time, nothing had changed since college. I had never worked my way through it.
If kept hidden, no one can help you.
After sharing something that was hidden, it loses it's power. For me, I realized I had to talk to people about this. And, once I did, I was able to look at things more clearly, and deal with the doubt.

So, don't hide doubts, fears or sins. Share them! That's when some real progress can be made!

The story continues. . .

CRaSH is a short series of lessons learned from a time of deep struggle in my life. View all posts here.

My C.R.a.S.H. (Part I): The Preview

2011-03-09T17:00:00.001-06:00

There are certain periods of life that we remember well. Sometimes it's an amazing concert, a sunny vacation, or a perfect "Kodak moment" sunset. Or, perhaps it's a tough time in life. Times when we feel disconnected, alone, or frustrated. Either way, they stick with us.

Last week, I lived in both of these extremes. I'm pretty sure I could write a book on all the life lessons I learned. Instead, I'm going to write out the story and lessons here, for all to see (because who has time to write a book?)

I'm going to be calling this short series CRaSH, or Career Reassessment and Some Hardships. (Doesn't CRaSH sound better?) The focal point of everything that happened was in my future career. When I was honest with myself, I could not answer this question: "Am I really passionate about medicine?" But, I'm getting ahead of myself.

Through this time of doubt, frustration, and searching, I believe that the Lord purposefully was teaching me something (a lot of things!) Through writing this story, I want to share what I've learned about:

Where we get our satisfaction in life
The importance of Community
How abundantly God wants to bless all areas of our life
The issue of 'hiding' our problems from others.
And more...

I'm really excited to share this story with everyone. I think this is not only beneficial for readers, but also for me to solidify exactly what happened last week. I'm posting these as soon as they're written, and I hope to have the first part up this week! So stay tuned...

A Super Bowl Sunday Story

2011-03-03T23:06:00.000-06:00

A ~~Chance~~ Designed Encounter

I like football. I really do. Until the day I die, I will probably be a Kansas City Chiefs fan, not matter how many Sundays are spent yelling at the television. Football is just simply great entertainment. I remember watching the big game with some friends from The Village Church. We had a good time eating together, making fun of the halftime show, and rooting for the Green Bay Packers. And we laughed at the commercials, each second costing millions of dollars, and soon forgot them. It was a good night.

A week after the game, I met someone who had a very different experience of that night. It was Valentine's Day, oddly enough, the first day I began volunteering in the ER of a major Dallas hospital. There was a man there, probably homeless. I never caught his name. I had to pass by him multiple times as I worked. Each time I passed by, I was careful not to bump his feet in the narrow hallway. They looked to be burned - mostly black with a few specks of pink. I didn't think much of it as I worked (there is some CRAZY stuff there). But later I overheard his conversation:

"So, it looks like you have some frostbite here. How long have you had this?"

"A week or so. Since the day of the Super Bowl."

"Why didn't you have shoes on?"

"Don't have none."

And that was all I caught, but it was enough.

-----| | |-----

So, What's the Right Action?

I'd love to analyze the irony of the hundreds of millions of dollars spent on the Super Bowl while a guy like this froze in the street. But it doesn't do him justice. The tough reality is that with all our technology and financial wizardry, even in 2011, this still happens. People freeze, even in Dallas.

I am aware that there are many intricacies and points of view on homelessness. Some people choose homelessness, while others abuse the system and use all their donations for alcohol. I have met and talked with both types of people in Houston. But there is one thing we must get straight - read this:

"Is not this the [way] I choose: to loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the straps of the yoke, to let the oppressed go free and to break every yoke? Is it not to share your bread with the hungry and bring the homeless poor into your house; when you see the naked, to cover him, and not to hide yourself from you own flesh?

Then shall your light break forth like the dawn, and your healing shall spring up speedily; your righteousness shall go before you; the glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard. Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer; you shall cry, and he will say, 'Here I am.'

If you take away the yoke from your midst, the pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness, if you pour yourself out for the hungry and satisfy the desire of the afflicted, then shall your light rise in the darkness and your gloom be as the noonday. And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail." {Isaiah 58:6-11}

Whatever our views, if we want to be obedient to God's words, we must help them. And I hope and pray we can continue to have compassion towards them, especially when others do not.

-----| | |-----

Oppression is always oppression / No matter the reasons or means / For skin or for sex / By stares or by fists it's the same / There are blinders on everyone ~ Derek Webb, American Flag Umbrella

Libya: What I Know from Reading too Many CNN Articles

2011-02-24T21:00:00.002-06:00

UPDATE: GOOD CHANCE TRIPOLI (& GADDAFI) MAY FALL TODAY. (bbc)

What's going on?

I've already explained the situation many times this way, so just go with it.

Col. Gaddafi is the leader of Libya. Think of him as Darth Vader, ruling The Empire (Libya) very strictly. The country's military is loyal first to him, but. . . many units are defecting to join The Rebellion.

The Rebellion began around Feb 16. "Protests of any kind are prohibited in Libya but the latest unrest was triggered by the arrest of a lawyer who is an outspoken critic of the government." (BBC.com). Soon, the peaceful protests were broken up with severe violence. Eventually, the people began to take control of major cities and increasingly called for Gaddafi to quit.

Now, the Rebellion has gained control of the majority of the country, most of the east. However, Gaddafi has begun to use his troops to severely retaliate against the rebels. In a recent article, a bomber crashed outside a major city because the pilots bailed out. Their orders? Bomb the major civialian city of Benghazi (670,000 people). (read CNN article on this). Also, there was a report of Gaddafi ordering four warships to fire artillery on these same eastern cities. Bad stuff.

So, if it wasn't clear before, Col. Gaddafi will do anything, including murdering civilians, to stay in power.

But, from the looks of things, the 'rebels' are almost in control of Libya. The final battle will be for Tripoli, the home of Gaddafi and the military. Meanwhile, the control of the rebels is moving from east to west, towards Tripoli. Check out this map:

(http://ericyoungonline.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/libya-map-control-of-key-cities-feb-24.jpg?w=664&h=300)

Why should we care?
1. Injustice.

The people in Libya are being massacred. Many reports come in each day about the military firing on civilians and peaceful protesters using snipers, strafing planes, bombers, warships. It is the final flailings of a ruler trying to stay in power against his entire nation.

2. Oil.
The United States does not get oil from Libya. However, a majority of Europe's oil (85%) does come from there. If they are not able to get oil, we will both be competing for the same supply and voila, prices go up. Fixed supply, higher demand = higher prices. That's why gas is currently $3.20 in Dallas.

The worst-case scenario for the US is if these same protests begin in Saudi Arabia. That is who we pay to get our oil-addiction fix. At this time, things seem to be going well there. But, it is definitely worth keeping an eye on them.

3. Protests: Good or Bad for the Middle East?
I have seen two general views on the spreading protests: The Optimists and Pessimists.

The Optimists believe that these revolutions will put strict, Islamic authoritarian leaders out of power and usher in democracies. This would be a great thing, giving more rights, freedoms and power to the people.

But, the other side believes these protests could actually make things worse. In more unstable countries (Libya), the old leaders could be switched out for even more radical leaders. This could lead to more wars, between countries and with Israel. I can't find the link for this article, but I thought it was a good point.

For now, we can only hope and pray that the rest of these protests will stay peaceful and that demands will be met without violence. Other potential conflicts are currently going on in: Saudi Arabia, Iran, Yemen, Algeria, Morrocco, Bahrain, Jordan, Iraq, China (!).

So, there it is. I'm glad my addiction to CNN & BBC could be of use!

Curse you Shane Hipps! - Intentionality Online

2011-02-23T17:00:00.001-06:00

Alright, don't worry - I don't hate Shane Hipps. It's more that I don't like changing. Hipps wrote this recent article which disrupted my normal internet habits. Give it a glance, as it is definitely worth the read.

Since then, I have spent lots of time reconsidering what my own online presence should look like. When I was honest with myself, I began to see immaturity in my social media outlets. Facebook simply became a way to show off my photos and let people know how "cool" I was. I didn't feel like I could be honest there or it may mess up my "image."

While Twitter was fun for a while, it became clear how little those hundreds of (actually) great quotes did not really effect me. Twitter doesn't want to slow down and focus on deep meaning; it wants new, trendy, and fast.

Intentionality is Key
So, for the past few months, I have tried to really be intentional in those areas about what I'm sharing, and why. Now, that campaign is trickling down to this blog.

In my reflection, I believe I have been trying to do too much with this blog. I want to write music reviews, share about small victories, and post links to lolcats. But, it's time to slim things down. To give focus here, I have come up with a purpose statement for my blog. Cheesy? Maybe. But, my hope is that my posts will be much more useful when focused on a few points, not everything that comes through my brain.

Without further ado, The Purpose Statement:

There are three things I want to write about on bryceTHINK: 1. Lessons I have/am learning 2. Truths I have realized 3. Awareness of world events / injustices.

The first two are for teaching others and edification. Also, the casual reader may have noticed that I haven't focused on that last one, but it is fast becoming a passion of mine.

Therefore, no more funny links, crazy ideas, or music lyrics will be posted. But, my hope is that this really cuts down on the clutter and inspires me to write regularly on important things that I care about.

Before I go, I ask you to think about this question: "Why do I use social media?" In my own view, I saw much pride and narcisism even in my most "Christian" moments. "Look at this cool quote I found! Check out how much fun I am having with my friends! Jealous?"

Recognizing the problem is the first step, so from here on out I want to focus these technologies for intentional, positive purposes.

"If we learn to wake up and understand, perhaps we will be able to use [Twitter, Facebook] rather than be used by them." - Shane Hipps

bryceTHOUGHT 2: One Rule

2011-01-28T23:42:00.003-06:00

I have one important rule: Thou shall not blog past 11 PM. After that time, you can write, but it's well worth a glance through in the morning before you post.

I tend to ramble or go into really deep things which I don't explain very well past 11 o'clock.
Examples:

http://brycethink.blogspot.com/2010/08/cube-invasion11.html
http://brycethink.blogspot.com/2010/01/jig-is-up.html
http://brycethink.blogspot.com/2008/04/i-was-on-avalanche.html
http://brycethink.blogspot.com/2008/03/dismantle-repair.html
http://brycethink.blogspot.com/2008/02/honest-thinkings.html

But that is not what this post is about. I'm going to do my best to keep this one really simple.

I want to learn to play piano.

Bryce

bryceTHOUGHT 1: The Kindle Caper

2011-01-27T16:30:00.001-06:00

So, I ordered a Kindle last week with a bunch of money I got from my birthday. Last month, I was able to play around with my mom's, while I set it up for her (I am apparently the 'tech-savvy' one in the family... if they only knew). I thought it was neat, but wasn't crazy for one.

Then I began to see the light. There are some really amazing things you can do with this thing. Also, Amazon has HUNDREDS of books for FREE on their site. Plus, I was tired of lugging around my mammoth copy of The Brothers Karamazov.

I feel like a thief because I spent more than an hour last night downloading many of their free books. Most of them are older classics, and are surely on some old reading list. I think I came away with 50 books. For free!

Here are a few of the better ones:
The Works of Edgar Allan Poe - Volume 1,2,3,4 ; The Jungle ; Notes from the Underground ; The Idiot ; Crime and Punishment ; Anna Karenina ; The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes ; Orthodoxy ; The New Jerusalem.

Bryce

[Cricket Chirp]

2011-01-26T14:38:00.000-06:00

Oh yeah, I still own a blog. . .

Well, I obviously haven't been keeping up with this lately, but I have a plan!

"Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.
See, I am doing a new thing!"
No, it won't be as tremendous as what Isaiah is referring to. . . but I have found a way to help me blog more. I'm going to be writing 'BryceTHOUGHTS', since this is BryceTHINK. Basically, I'm going to give myself a short amount of time (since this seems to be my excuse for blogging), say five or ten minutes. Then, I'll just write about random subjects until time is up. So, I can blog and not think I'm wasting time.

I'm hoping that by forcing myself to write more, I'll remember why I enjoy it and have somehow kept a blog these last years. Who knows. We shall see.

Bryce

"Pop Songs Can Heal the Soul" - Sufjan Stevens

2010-10-22T23:15:00.000-05:00

I may have an unhealthy love for Sufjan. With each new song, he becomes more and more of a musical genius to me. Why? For one, he is insanely talented, with the most soothing voice (see here) and musical ingenuity (see here). Two, all of his (good) songs instantly communicate a deep intimacy with the listener (see here) (and here). And finally, for his unshakable view and love of God. Let me camp here for a second.

Through his songs, he is able to communicate this being, who loves us so much, who wants the best for us, and who is already so close... A great instance is in this song. When I listen to it, I am comforted, not by Sufjan, but by this infinitely intimate being he describes:

I always knew you / in your mothers arms

i have called your name / i have an idea

placed in your mind / to be a better man

ive made a crown for you / put it in your room

and when the bride groom comes / there will be noise

there will be glad / and a perfect man

and when you write a poem / i know the words

i know the sounds / before you write it down

and when you wear your clothes / i wear them too

i wear your shoes / and your jacket too

i always knew you / in your mothers arms

i have called you son / ive made amends

between father and son / or if you havent one

rest in my arms / sleep in my bed

there is a design / to what i did and said

Man, gets me every time.

Anyways, I saw him in concert this week, and it was... different. Sufjan is still himself, but he has moved into a strange world of synthesizers and auto-tune. From the stage, he said for this album, he was giving up all his comforts (basically any classical instrument + the banjo), and just getting down to pure sound. There is one story I wanted to share.

He said he was going through a time of intense isolation, heartbreak, and loneliness. During this time, he found the work of one Royal Robertson. Still on stage, he explained to us Robertson's life. Royal was a painter living in Louisiana, with a deep fracture. "His work struck me as beautiful and divine and tragic," Stevens said. Royal dove deep into this futuristic, spacey art world, dealing with his own heartaches and a serious mental illness: schizophrenia. "During this time in my life, Royal's art was a kind of guide," Sufjan claimed.

(He dedicated the next song ~~"The Dress Looks Nice on You,"~~ "Heirloom" to Robertson's widow, who was at the show.)

And voila - he released 'Age of Adz', a complete detachment from his usual folksy music. In 'Adz', Sufjan relies on drumbeats, synthesizers, and other crazy sounds in-betweeen.

BUT - the music is still awesome. Sufjan is still Sufjan, and his CD, most of which he played in Dallas, was his own psycho-therapy session, he claims.

As for the concert, the show was amazing. Like a broadway production meeting a laser-light show, he rocked. Throw in dueling drumsets, trombones, space-dressed backup singers. . . and you have quite a show.

Like I said before, Sufjan's music brings an instant intimacy, and his presence on stage did the same. He laughed at a few mistakes, and expressed the pain which produced this album.

For the finale, he played the epic 25-minute long song "Impossible Soul." He calls this his personal psycho-therapy session, and if you take the time to listen, he invites us into his most intimate doubts, pains and struggles. The lyrics are wrought with statements like "Do you want to be afraid?", "Don't be shy in the window / come down and give your best", "Don't be distracted","It's a long life /Better pinch yourself /put your face together / better get it right / it's a long life / better hit yourself /put your face together /gotta stand up straight / it's a long life / only one last chance / couldn't get much better / do you wanna dance? "

He said, (jokingly?) in explaining the different parts of the song, "I believe pop songs can heal the soul. At least mine."

It's like Sufjan is reminding himself of who he is, what his weaknesses are, and how to act when he doesn't know what to do. Uh, hello, I can definitely relate to that! He ends the song with the refrain "Boy, we can do much more together!" Taken one way, this could be a woman speaking... But to me, I see it as simply we can do more together than alone. A lesson I need to remember, and one I think Sufjan portrays as well (he's quite an isolationist).

The best part is during this song, he broke out a shiny wig, the autotune, and danced! (hilarious/epic video here).

So, I'm not sure where this was headed. . .

The concert was great, and Sufjan is still making great music, sharing his talents, his love, fear, and disagreements with of God, rolled up with songs about the apocalypse (see here), death, afterlife, love...

He may want to get a restraining order against me.

The set list from Sufjan Stevens at SMU's McFarlin Auditorium (10-20-10)

1. Seven Swans (from 2004's 'Seven Swans')
2. Too Much (from 2010's 'The Age of Adz')
3. Age of Adz (from 'The Age of Adz')
4. Heirloom (from 2010's 'All Delighted People' EP)
5. I Walked (from 'The Age of Adz')
6. Futile Devices (from 'The Age of Adz')
7. Vesuvius (from 'The Age of Adz')
8. Now That I'm Older (from 'The Age of Adz')
9. Get Real Get Right (from 'The Age of Adz')
10. Enchanting Ghost ('All Delighted People' EP)
11. Impossible Soul (from 'The Age of Adz')
12. Chicago (from 2005's 'Illinois')

ENCORE

1. Concerning the UFO Sighting Near Highland ('Illinois')
2. Casimir Pulaski Day ('Illinois')
3. The Dress Looks Nice on You ('Seven Swans')

Video from the concert (not mine):

Seven Swans - http://www.youtube.com/user/bdkoehn#p/u/5/zY-im_2FG-Y

Too Much - http://www.youtube.com/user/bdkoehn#p/u/4/31HKfHIPD-U

Impossible Soul (pop part) - http://www.youtube.com/user/bdkoehn#p/u/3/wBTHwFIM2oo

Impossible Soul (end) - http://www.youtube.com/user/bdkoehn#p/u/2/CCGlCYAF1T

Chicago - http://www.youtube.com/user/bdkoehn#p/u/1/-URGNH_LTZA

Pursuing III: Frightening Biases and The Glory of 'Me' in Social Media

2010-10-22T22:08:00.000-05:00

This is the third post in a series exploring the idea of Pursuing others and building relationships. Check back each Thursday for more. For the entire series, click here.

Frightening Biases

Have you ever heard anyone ask, "Would Jesus have had a facebook? Would he have 'tweeted'?" ? You won't get my answer, because I think this debate is pointless. Having these social media outlets is not a moral issue; these technologies are simple tools, which happen to be very popular right now.

I gathered these thoughts after a very challenging article by Shane Hipps. I suggest you read it. In fact, if you don't, you prove his premise that our generation is moving towards communication by short, simple statements and sustained illiteracy is becoming a thing of the past. Here's his article.

The article says some concerning things. He explains how every technology we use has an innate bias; a pronounced side-effect. For instance, in major cities, the technology of public transportation biases people to walk more, compared to smaller cities. Facebook, Twitter and every other social media are simply technologies, neither good nor bad, but with key innate biases. And the ones Shane brings up are frightening.

First, he digs through facebook. Essentially, facebook teaches us to be narcissists; although facebook is for 'connecting', our lengthy time spent creating our profile, which is how others see us, is leading us towards narcissism. We end up staring at our own image in the water more often than others', just like Narcissus. "Many of these technologies create a condition of absence in a world desperate for our presence."

And then there's Twitter. Now, the interesting thing here is that there actually are good, profound quotes and experiences on Twitter. BUT, the average lifespan of a tweet is less than an hour! "Twitter has no patience for time. Twitter bypasses these things so it can express... This does not make Twitter bad, invalid or useless. It simply means twitter is a medium more likely to convey cliché's rather than deep aphorisms of profound insight." We read, we are entertained and thought-provoked, then forget.

-------| | |-------

So... what?

After reading this article, I had to take a deep look into why I updated my facebook status, and why I continued to tweet my boring life. Also, why did I spend hours reading material I've long forgotten? What was I seeking? What are we seeking?

For a while, I was seeking a savior. I believed that once I found that perfect quote or that awesome article, I wouldn't need all of this input. I'd be set. Yet, after what, 3 years now, I can barely remember the last tweet I read. In a snowball of information, the profound is lost in the 'cute', the 'trend', and the endless hyperlinks...

So, back to the original question. How would Jesus have used twitter, or facebook? Would he tweet out his sermons? Would he poke his disciples? I don't think he would.

It's interesting how many people Jesus, who himself came to pursue all mankind for his Father, turned so many people away, and wanted to keep things on the DL. There was no 'You're invited, come to the sermon on the mount!!!!' facebook event and he never tweeted his location for the crowds. In fact, I see the opposite.

Check out these verses:

Matthew 8:4 - "See to it that you say nothing to anyone, but go..."

Matthew 9:30 - And Jesus sternly warned them, "See that no one knows about it."

Luke 8:38 - But Jesus sent him away saying, "Return to your home, and declare how much God has done for you."

Luke 8:56 - And her parents were amazed, but he charged them to tell no one what had happened.

There's a lot more, just look around...

I'm not sure about you, but it's simple pride for me. I want people to see me, to retweet me, to think "OMG, that Bryce guy, he is hilarious!" So, I've really had to check myself lately - facebook and twitter are fertile grounds for me to become more and more prideful, more and more narcissistic, building up my image, my glory, me.

How does ANY of that line up with the gospel? The Bible says I am dead, it is only Christ who lives. In my pride, I build a castle of sand, just waiting to be washed away... When Christ lived, he was homeless a lot, had few real friends (and even they left him in the end), ate from those he taught, walked everywhere rebuking people for their sins... He was no celebrity, and probably not very well-liked. He did not try to grab any glory for himself, "did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing...(Phil. 2)."

-------| | |-------

Well, I got a little off-topic here, but that's alright. I hope this post challenges us to re-think why we're using social media, and how we could use it to bring glory to God, not ourselves. I decided to add it to this series because I have learned that online-only relationships are hardly worthy of that word. They are nice, cute, but in the end, bring each party little but entertainment.

Before you go and join a monastery we'll talk next week at why we MUST influence.

Yeah...

2010-10-21T21:07:00.002-05:00

Sorry for the lack of updates. Last week got a little crazy getting ready to go down to C-Stat. This week has been surprisingly super-busy, but good. I have a bunch of thoughts about the next pursuing post, but nothing concrete yet. And now, this sickness I picked up in C-stat is getting the best of me. But, I promise an update soon, and hopefully some thoughts from Sufjan Stevens' concert last night... Stay tuned. . .

Why Pursue? A Disturbance in Perspective

2010-10-07T21:58:00.000-05:00

This is the second post in a series exploring the idea of Pursuing others and building relationships. Check back each Thursday for more. For the whole series, click here.

This week, some visitors came to my small group. My plan was to leave a little early, but I became entranced by their call to be missionaries in Papua New Guinea. In a nutshell, their function would be a supporting role to the missionaries out in 'the bush'. This may not sound like a big deal, but let me recount what I learned about Papua New Guinea.

Imagine a big island with 6 million people, and Hawaii-like jungles. Now, take out all infrastructure, and rewind history to when people were separated into tribes; precisely 865 small bands of people, with a distinct language, living in an equatorial jungle. That's Papua New Guinea. There are currently 320-ish tribes living as animists, cannibals, or both, unreached.

Back in the day, the first missionaries to go to the jungles were killed. But, a second group was invited to live with a tribe. They learned their language. They shared the gospel. A church was built. Disciples were made. And more missionaries went to more tribes. Now, the husband that talked with us would provide construction of houses in each village, while the wife will work as a nurse to the missionaries. They are committing four years of their life to simply support the missionaries living among the tribes.

What possible motivation would it take for a couple to commit this amount of time and effort, losing all 21st century comforts, just to help people who are visiting villages?

-------| | |-------

I didn't walk away that night with a call to be a missionary. But, my perspective was severely challenged. I realized there are some KEY issues that I may 'say' I believe, but my actions prove me wrong. What I saw in the young couple was that they DID believe these things.

1. Without the gospel, people who die will be in Hell. Forever.
If I truly believed this, wouldn't the gospel be the only thing I ever talked about? They are going to Papua New Guinea to literally save people from Hell.

2. ... and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, "It is more blessed to give than to receive." (Acts 20:35)
I have found I like to receive, and take for myself... Meanwhile they are giving a huge amount of time and effort for people they've never met living in a jungle.

3. We are sojourners here.
My lifestyle does not reflect this - I'm digging in, building up my nest. They are living with eternity in mind, knowing that no treasure here lasts, and that people are eternal

-------| | |-------

Wow, so that wasn't really where I thought this post would head, but I want to close with one final piece of motivation: your own story.

I am scared to think of the person I would be if it wasn't for someone who pursued me for Christ. After years of attending church, I finally understood the gospel because my youth minister pursued me, and formed a relationship with me. Without him or someone else pursuing me for Christ, I would NEVER have chosen God's way.

But, he did find me. Someone formed a relationship with him, and before them another... all the way back to the disciples and Paul, telling everyone... even back to Jesus himself, pursuing others for His Father.

With this legacy behind us, isn't it our turn to pursue others for Christ?

He told them, “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field. Go! I am sending you out like lambs among wolves."

(Luke 10:2-3)

Why Aren't you Getting to Know Me?

2010-09-30T21:23:00.000-05:00

This is the first post in a series exploring the idea of Pursuing others and building relationships. Check back each Thursday for more.

I recently read a compelling article from one of our Forge speakers. Check it out, then come back here.

His premise was about loving people, despite their reactions to our love.

"You see, somewhere along the line we got it in our heads that the call to love the world was simultaneously a call to make the world love us."

"But it’s important for us to remember that love does not have to be reciprocated in order to be authentic. When we define love as a transaction or exchange, it rapidly turns into something self-serving and conditional. Loving you so you’ll love me is not the same thing as loving you."

"Their response must have no bearing on our love. We are called to love, not necessarily to be loved."

His thoughts reminded me of a similar lesson I learned last year. But it wasn't about love; it was about pursuing and relationships - a lesson I had forgotten. Through this short series, I hope to remember and explore why we should pursue relationships, reciprocated or not.

-------| | |-------

Our group had just survived a pretty tough week. I can't really go into details as I'm sworn to secrecy. But, during a meeting to work out some of our tensions, someone brought out the idea that people were 'slipping through the cracks.' Many in our group felt overlooked, un-loved and forgotten. When this was voiced, I felt like part of that 'forgotten' group - I felt like there we were, a couple months of living together, and no one had really pursued a real, deep relationship with me.

Luckily, during a talk with one of my closest Forge friends, I was hit with how selfish I had been. I had put zero effort into building relationships with others, and then there I was feeling sorry for no one coming to build one with me. I just wanted to take and take, and not give anything.

Still, I think I would have been upset if I had tried to build relationships and still nothing was reciprocated. Then, I would have felt like I had some grounds to condemn the other Forge members, right?

Later in the year, we got "Lantzed." I don't remember the exact discussion, but it had something to do with people feeling like their 'needs' weren't being met; basically, the part two of our previous talk. Matt reminded us that Jesus lived, ate, and built into his disciples all day, every day, for three years. Did He ever feel like some of His needs weren't being met? Without getting all theological, I would say a resounding "Yes!" Still, He pursued them fully, teaching them, leading them, giving all He had to make them into leaders; however, their behavior did not limit his efforts.

-------| | |-------

I understand we are called to love all, despite reciprocation. But, I've already forgotten this lesson. I find myself still waiting for others to build into me. So, I want to focus on pursuing, and post my thoughts as I struggle and learn here. On this blog, what I want to explore is:

-What is pursuing? What is the difference between love and pursuing?

-How did God pursue us?

-How did Christ pursue us?

-Why pursue others, and how can we pursue others?

I'm hoping to have a post on these topics each Thursday so be sure to check back next week.

BowerBirds | Efterklang 9.25.10

2010-09-30T20:21:00.000-05:00

This spring, I made a blog for future photography projects. I just put up the pictures from last weekend's concert:

blazon photography

Before Xbox's 'Kinect'... there was the Powerglove

2010-08-22T22:01:00.000-05:00

So, I'm sure you've heard of Microsoft's latest money-baby - Kinect.

But, 22 years ago, Nintendo had a very similar idea: the Power Glove. Prepare to be wowed less by technology and more by 1980's marketing:

The Power Glove. It's so BAD!

You may now return to something productive.

Running: It's All About the Music

2010-08-19T23:04:00.000-05:00

So, I am not the leading authority on running, but I have found one thing very helpful: music. We worked out each week at the Forge, and it was really the first time I had a regular running schedule. However, I never listened to music while running.

Fast forward to July, when I was finally settled into Dallas, I started running again. And, my friends, music makes all the difference. So, here is some advice on what to listen to while you burn away those Ho-Ho's.

1. Pick upbeat songs. This is key. I can't run to slower, chiller bands such as Explosions in the Sky or Moby. No, no. What you need are songs with a fast tempo, cause your feet will want to match it. Pick a faster song, and you can improve your times.

2. Pick songs you actually like. So, with this being said, don't just go and get all the techno and rave songs you can. Once, I was surprised by Journey's "Separate Ways", which I had put on my playlist as a semi-joke. But, it came on one time, and I was able to push ahead, focusing on my love of classic rock instead of my deflated lungs and lead legs.

3. Skip songs as you run. If a song comes on you don't like / want. Skip it. It's your life, take some control!

4. Breathe. This is another great thing about music. During that silence between songs, I've realized that I breathe pretty loudly about 1/4 of my way into a run. But, when that music is playing, I don't care who hears. So, I'm able to suck in that air and not care who's listening.

5. Turn up the Volume. This one took some experimenting, but I've found turning up the volume helps me run faster. You can really get into those songs, you know? I'd say I usually listen to my iPod around the halfway mark. But, when running, it's closer to 3/4. Just one more thing to push you.

6. Pick songs that yell at you. So, you like your song, it's upbeat, and the volume is up. The last things that helps me run faster are songs a little outside my usual listening - throw in some Coheed and Cambria, mewithoutYou, Family Force Five... it's almost like a mini-Brooks Beless yelling at you to keep going.

Bryce's Top Ten Music to Listen to While Running:

- Stretching -
10. Arcade Fire - Ready to Start - This song gets me pumped up. Starts off slow, builds in some layers... But, I'm a little obsessed with this album right now, so it may be biased.

- Starting off -
9. mewithoutYou - Nice and Blue - I've found this hard drum beat to be the perfect tempo for me to start running. Plus, they start yelling, and man!- it just gets me going!
8. Arcade Fire - Wake Up - Again, starts off slow (maybe a little too slow). But, I usually just start listening to the song and forget I'm running. (I want to actually start waking up to this song.)

- Running -
7. mewithoutYou - Bullet to Binary - One of my favorites. Early mewithoutYou is screamo mewithoutYou. At one point, they're yelling in French. What's not to love?
6. Lecrae - Go Hard - This one always gets me. With Lecrae shouting 'Go Hard or Go Home,' I start thinking, "You're right Lecrae, I'm gonna go hard, cause I don't wanna go home!! ARRRRGH!!"

- Pushing Through the Pain -
5. Switchfoot - Bullet Soul - About the 3/4 mark, I need music I like to listen to and forget my pain. So, this catchy tune usually takes me away from my pain.
4. Journey - Separate Ways - Once, I was running in some really hot weather, and felt like quitting. Then, I heard the guitars at the beginning, and had a complete out-of-body-experience. Also, it makes me think of this scene in 'Yes Man' (especially the end). Works like a charm...
3. Rush - The Spirit of Radio - Again, if this comes on at the end, it's such a surprise. I end up getting lost in Neil Peart's drumming prowess.

- Finishing -
2. Coldplay - Viva la Vida - For me, I like a really good song at the end which, I don't know, just lifts your spirits. I imagine this song to be playing as I run into the olympic stadium or something.
1. Edison Glass - The Jig is Up - Not only my top running song, but one of my faves anytime. The message behind this amazing song inspires me to finish strong as much as the music.

Alright, now get off the computer, grab the iPod, and get fit!

Battlestar Galactica: A Beginner’s Guide

2010-08-07T16:45:00.000-05:00

STOP. Don’t skip over this post; don’t just mark as ‘read’

Yes, the title of the show (and now this blog post) is SEVERLY nerdy. Please, just read over some facts about why I think the show is accessible to all.

1. You don’t have to be a Sci-Fi fan to enjoy this show.

This is not Star Wars, nor Star Trek. After watching five minutes of the show, you will see it as a demi-LOST, only in space. (but not Lost in Space)

2. The show is about characters, not Sci-Fi gizmos.

The producers say in an extra features – “We don’t really care how people will make coffee on spaceships or use light-speed. We wanted to focus on making characters and a story people will enjoy, not fancy machines.”

3. “Thou shalt be real.”

This is one of the first rules the producers decided on when making the show. They didn’t want a clean, Star-Trekkish ship. They wanted one that actually looked like people lived (and died) there.

4. You do not have to know anything about the original show.

And, from what I gather, they’ve changed a lot of things anyways (which makes the hardcore fans upset.)

5. Dr. Baltar is an antagonist.

If you do actually check out the show, this is very helpful. I watched the whole first season and was so pissed at this guy. But, apparently we’re supposed to hate him. He slipped by my radar as a narcissistic good guy; don’t be fooled, he’s technically an antagonist. This will help you enjoy the show so you don’t have to try to like him when you are screaming at the TV.

SUMMING UP

So, give this show a chance. I enjoyed the first season (all I’ve seen). On my (limited) TV show judging scale, I would place BG third – LOST, Arrested Development, Battlestar Galactica, Burn Notice, The Office. (And if you know me, you know I love Burn Notice… )

Overall, the show has intriguing characters and a stellar storyline. Also, when the whole human race is being destroyed, some tough ethical decisions come up. When you throw all of this in the oven, out comes a very intelligent, emotional TV drama.

Check it out, the cool people at IMDB didn’t give it 9/10 for nothing.

B R Y C E

PS Also, note that the ‘first’ episode was a three-part, three-hour miniseries. Keep that in mind for viewing time. Split it up. Or don’t?

CUBE INVASION!!!11!!!

2010-08-03T22:27:00.000-05:00

Got some time to waste? Want to end up with a nerdy desktop? Then check out CubeeCraft!

You’re welcome.

Bryce

3 6 5

2010-08-03T22:20:00.000-05:00

So, I joined a cult on flickr last spring called 365 days. It's basically a bunch of crazy photographers with a simple idea. You take a self-portrait. Every day. For a year. I began the journey last year, but only made it halfway-ish. I decided to give it up when the Forge started.

Not this time. 8/1/2010 = Day 1. Actually, I’m pretty excited to start again. I haven’t touched my camera since the end of the Forge in May. I already have a few new ideas.

The best thing about the project was it always kept my mind going in photography mode. After handling the camera, every day, for 148 or so days, things really started to click.

Now, the only hurdle is – what do I call it? Last year, it was simply 365days. But, what about this time? 365 v.2? threesixfive? 365-2010?

I’m sure I’ll figure it out soon…

Also, all photo posts will go here: clickmeclickmeclickme

B R YC E

[[originally written 7-30-10]]

Faithful Faithful Faithful

2010-07-06T19:51:00.000-05:00

When we visited Bet She'an in Israel, our tour guide Marty was unusually frustrating with us. He asked us what the disciples had to offer the then-modern city. Bet She'an had theaters, colleges, running water, and temples for every "spiritual need." We sat and told him an entire list of things Christianity offered, and each time he told us how his Roman city met that need.

Later that day, Marty told us what the disciples had to offer. It wasn't any theological theorem or proof. It was simply their story. Marty proceeded to tell us his story. It was simply that God is faithful, faithful, faithful. Marty had gone through some rough, rough times, including a sudden divorce. Yet, each time, God revealed his purpose and blessed him. More than once, when Marty needed a car, someone would approach him and offer him one!

I tell you all of this to share that this has been my story for the last month. Every need that has come my way has been met.

First, my job at UT Southwestern was totally unexpected. I had applied here in late March and heard nothing for a month and a half. Then, I had two interviews within a week at UT! Both involved research and were looking for a short (1-2 year) commitment. Very quickly, I landed a job and was moving to Dallas.

Naturally, I needed a place to stay. I made arrangements to stay with some family in Denton for a time. This was a huge blessing as I could focus on starting my job, etc for a few weeks. I looked into apartments and found a decently priced one near my work. I found it the second day looking for apartments!

Now, my Honda is falling apart quickly. First, the air compressor went out, so I don't have any A/C. Then, my car overheated on the highway last week. I think it's stable for now, but I'm not sure. However, after everything else, what do I have to fear? I am confident that even if my car dies, it's not only God's plan, but it's for something even better.

I was taught a huge lesson that day as well. All my life, I've had this fear of... well, people. I didn't want to be late for fear of my boss not liking me, I guess. But, this stems from a larger fear of impressing, wanting people to like me. But, that took a huge hit when I showed up an hour and a half late. My boss understood, and things went on as normal. It's allowed me to realize some things are more important than others. A relationship won't be broken over some sort of bad impression or a mistake. That was huge for me.

Anyways, I'm amazed at how fast things have gone here. Through the craziness of the past month, God has been my rock. Moreover, He's been shaping me to rely on Him each day. "Abide with me, and I will abide with you."

As a sidenote, I can't stop listening to Gungor's CD Beautiful Things. Every track on there is pure gold and really reminds me of my relationship with God. Here's some lyrics to chew on:

You called and You shouted

You broke through my deafness

You flashed and you shone

Dispelled all my blindness

You breathed Your fragrance on me

Late have I loved You

I drew in Your breath

And I keep on breathing

I’ve tasted I’ve seen

And now I want more

You breathed Your fragrance on me

Late have I loved You

365 Days, Round 2?

2010-06-17T22:30:00.000-05:00

So, last year, I did this challenge with a group on Flickr. Take a (creative) self-portrait every day for 365 days. I decided to end it just before the Forge, to focus there.

But, I think I want to start again...

Here's a link to last year's shots: 365 Days

Transitioning

2010-06-17T18:35:00.000-05:00

Having a real job is different. It's not terrible, I just need to get used to the new schedule - going to bed earlier, getting home late, remembering to eat breakfast...

Anyways, hopefully I'll be in a routine soon and can update more often. Right now, I'm just dead tired....

Bryce

Video Blog 1: Intro + Big News

2010-06-04T13:19:00.000-05:00

Video Blog 1 from Bryce on Vimeo.

Lancelot

2010-06-02T18:05:00.000-05:00

So, I took my advice from a few posts ago, and read a book - Lancelot by Walker Percy. I'm not going to try and tie it into LOST, because that's done and gone. But, I did enjoy the book. I'm not going to go into much detail right now, but I did want to share an interesting quote.

In the book, the main character comes to an awakening of sorts. He realizes he's been doing the same thing, everyday, for the past twenty years, a slave to his habits. But now, shocked out of his shell by an event (that's a whole other story...), he begins to really live. This is a snippet of his take on 'time.'

"No, that's not the mystery. The mystery lies in the here and now. The mystery is: What is one to do with oneself? As you get older you begin to realize the trick time is playing, and that unless you do something about it, the passage of time is nothing but the encroachment of the horrible banality of the past on the pure future. The past devours the future like a tape recorder, converting the pure possibility into banality. The present is the tape head, the mouth of time."

Like I said, I'll try to give more thoughts on the book after it digests some more. It's an interesting story, told in the second person, by a man in a nuthouse. As he retells some crazy events of his life, we also get his commentary about life and time... that's all you'll get for now though. Anyways, the quote has been motivating me lately, so I thought I'd share it.

Life in Transition: Part 2 - Teleportation

2010-05-28T12:37:00.000-05:00

Why haven't we figured this one out yet? It would make it a lot easier to go to an interview in Dallas if I could just step through some portal here in Kansas City. Forget about colliding atoms in the underground tunnel in Europe, we need to focus our efforts on something practical! But, by the time they do get around to teleportation, it'll probably be too late...

That's alright though, because I figured it out. Yep, I did it. On Monday, I went from Kansas City to Dallas with little physical effort. Now, it took about 8 hours and I had to make some bathroom stops mid-teleportationizing, but that's just details. . .

The point is I ended up in Dallas for my job interview. And, just to prove I could, I teleported back to Kansas City yesterday, by the same means...

Alright, forget about the teleportation. Let me get serious for a second. I'm really excited for these jobs in Dallas. There's a few reasons why, but the most important is this: I've never really earned a job all on my own before. I worked for three years at a restaraunt in high school, but my cousin was the manager, so I was a shoo-in. Then, in college, I worked with the newspaper, and my good friend was the editor. Even with Pine Cove, my good friend Indiana Jones was the program director. At the VA after college - my grandpa was on the research board! It seems that everywhere I've been, I've gotten in because I knew someone.

But now, with these jobs in Dallas, I have no connections. If I do end up with a job, it won't be because of a boss's order. It feels like a real start, you know?

- - -

It seems like each time I write here, I get an important phone call.

Just a few minutes ago, I got a call from the people I interviewed with this week. In their coded language of policy, they told me they were sending off my information to HR as a 'preferred candidate,' while assuring me that HR makes the final decision. . . I'm taking this to mean they want me! Building expectations? You betcha!

LOST Doesn't Have to End . . . Pick up a Book!

2010-05-25T21:28:00.000-05:00

So, LOST is over...

But, the fun doesn't have to end. The writers, Carlton and Damon have mentioned many times how much the Lost Books have meant to them. I saw a good interview with them; their advice was to 'read, read, read.' By throwing the books in, they can delve into deep, complex themes they didn't have time to fully develop in the show.

I'm not gonna read them all or anything crazy, but it's a good list . . .

Wide Open

2010-05-24T11:19:00.001-05:00

Good Day

2010-05-22T21:14:00.001-05:00

Good Day
Originally uploaded by blazon_

Rollin' by...

Life in Transition: Part 1 - A Rude Awakening

2010-05-20T10:57:00.000-05:00

Let me fill you in . . .

My life is in transition - the state of moving from one chapter to the next. I'm moving from the mega-maturation process of the Forge to securing a full-time job in Dallas. And let me be the first to tell you - life in transition is CRAZY. I was free from the craziness for a bit, but now, it has caught up with me again . . .

For 11 days, I was living with my Forge friends, first on our post-Forge trip through Texas, and then in Dallas. I was able to mooch off of the Seifreids for a few days until my interview with UT Southwestern. The interview went extremely well - they're looking for someone to work full-time for a short period (1-1/2 years); basically, this job is made for people looking to go on to grad school, like me.

But, things were tough in Dallas. It was great to still be with a few Forgies, but it still felt like the Forge hadn't really ended - I had no closure. So, after 11 days of mooching, I came back 'home' to Missouri.

I say 'home', because for the first time, it really doesn't feel like home. With the job and the thought of moving to Dallas in my sights, I feel like a guest here. Not to mention, I've spent the past week going through all my old junk, boxing up the stuff I want to take and throwing the rest away.

And then, this morning, I literally woke up to a phone call for an interview. Now, I have an interview in Dallas next week; the craziness has caught back up with me.

Things were quiet for a bit, but now more hard decisions are coming. With either position, I'm likely to START around the first of June. That means I could be LIVING and WORKING in Dallas in less than 10 days!

So, that phone call awakened me in more ways than one. Time to get moving.

Pluto

2010-05-19T23:42:00.001-05:00

He was hanging around while I was cleaning my room.

"The Jig is Up"

2010-01-07T22:53:00.000-06:00

Obsessed. I cannot stop listening to this song by Edison Glass.

It's such a huge reminder to me that I do not know everything, I can't even 'see' everything, and that I need to lean on His understanding...

Check it out here ---> The Jig is Up

Then go get Edison Glass' whole album!

"Your eyes see further than mine. I can see as far as the sun and the moon in the sky. Your hands are warmer than mine. I'm still alive, but I can't feel the warmth from inside.

How can you say the warmth makes you? How can you say your sight leads you home?

I asked with the right intent and bright eyes, but what I can't seem to figure out is how and why I can't seem to handle this.

I'll wait for Your words
I'll trust You'll say!

When we can't handle it all you'll say!

How can you say the warmth makes you? How can you say a sight leads you? How can you say?!

Your eyes see further than mine. I can see as far as the sun and the moon in the sky. I'll wait for your words, I'll trust you'll say!"

Yep, can't get enough of it.

B R Y C E

Music I Found this Year that I want to Pass On

2010-01-04T17:44:00.002-06:00

Here is a list of music I either first heard or just realized how awesome their music really was in 2009.

#10 Sufjan Stevens – “Songs For Christmas”

Labels: Christmas, folk, chillaxin’, deep lyrics, funny lyrics, Christian

So, this one barely made the list cause I’ve heard it a lot, I just never owned it myself. But what a great deal – there’s over 40 songs on this CD! All of them sound a little different than the normal Christmas tunes you’ve probably heard. But, the main reason I love this CD is the emphasis Stevens puts on the reason behind Christmas. Some of the songs sound more like worship music at times. Great CD overall.

Lyric from “Star of Wonder”

“Oh conscience where will you carry me?

I found you, star of terrifying effigies

When the night falls I carry myself to the fortress

Of your glorious cause, Oh how I may seek Your fortress.

When the night falls, we see the star of wonder

Wonderful night falls, we see You, we see You there!

I see the stars coming out…”

#9 Family Force Five – “Family Force Five”

Labels: funky rock, fun, dance-party music,

Again, I’ve heard this CD a lot, but finally bought it this year. This band is it’s own genre. Imagine some white guys from Arkansas trying to rap and rock. Apparently, they’re Christians, but you won’t find any worship songs here.

Lyric from “Kountry Gentleman”:

“My momma raised me in the dirty south

A country gentleman, so you best watch your mouth!”

#8 Switchfoot – “Hello Hurricane”

Labels: Rock, Christian

I really loved Switchfoot until “Oh Gravity!”. I thought they were done for after that album. So, when they released Hello Hurricane this year, I cautiously checked it out. And boy, I’m glad I did. They’ve gone back to more straight ‘rock’ with some great guitar compositions. Add in some clever lyrics, and boom! Great CD.

Lyric from “Needle and Haystack Life”:

“Your breathin’ in the highs and lows we call it living.

In this needle and haystack life

I found miracles there in your eyes

It’s no accident we’re here tonight

We are once in a lifetime.”

#7 William Fitzsimmons – The Sparrow and the Crow

Labels: Singer-Songwriter, Melancholy, Raw

Imagine you go through a long, hard divorce at a young age. Then, you pick up a guitar and write some songs about it. That is this album. Most of the songs focus on lost love, and you can feel his emotion throughout the whole album. I saw him live this year and I would recommend his show to any. Great musical talent and lyrics.

Lyric from “Just Not Each Other”:

“We lost our chance to love one another

Well love again but just not each other”

#6 Fleet Foxes – “Fleet Foxes”

Labels: folky, Medieval mild rock?, sweeping tunes

I really enjoy this band. Their music is what I imagine a medieval traveling band would sound like. Very soothing, flowing and relaxing while still inventive. Good stuff.

If you are NOT in the forge, I suggest you watch this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t1tbX_NJn98

Lyric from “Blue Ridge Mountains”

“In the quivering forest

Where the shivering dog rests

Our good grandfather

Built a wooden nest

And the river got frozen

And the home got snowed in

And the yellow moon glowed bright

Till the morning light

Terrible am I child?

Even if you don't mind”

#5 The Myriad – With Arrows, With Poise

Labels: Radiohead, MAE, Christian, Rock, Great Musically and Lyrically.

Have you ever heard of Radiohead? The lead singer of The Myriad sounds a lot like Thom Yorke, and the band goes toward that sound sometimes - lots of deep guitar and high singing, followed by complex drums and piano. Other times, they sound more like MAE – sort of pop-rock. They’re pretty new, but they are going places that’s for sure. Lyrically, you can hear some subtlety Christian messages.

Lyric from “Clean Shot”

“Hey now, oh no, You got a clean shot!

All the words you could pierce my heart!

Hey now, oh no, You run me right through!

With all these words that I’ve sung to You!”

#4 Snow Patrol – A Hundred Million Suns

Labels: Chillaxin’, Mild Rock, Love Songs, Great Lyrics

I’ve liked Snow Patrol’s past albums, but this one takes the cake. I haven’t listened to it in a while, but it’s a really phenomenal album. They have some great lyrics on love and distance, while delving into a little rock sometimes. Love it. Last song, “The Lightning Strike” is a 16-minute audio-feast – combines three songs going from sad to happy each time.

Lyric from “The Lightning Strike”

“Painted in flames

All peeling thunder

Be the lightning in me

That strikes relentless”

#3 Edison Glass – “Time is Fiction”

Labels: Creative, Rock/ Hard Rock, Christian, Great Musically

Yes. I cannot stop listening to this band. From the opening song “Let Go”, a short song about singing out loud (Open your lips/ Let out a song/ Open your Heart/ And let is sing), to “The Jig is Up”, a hard rock ballad about faith vs. sight, this band manages to infuse very creative sounds and deep lyrics without ever getting stale. One of the better bands, nay, the BEST band that’s come into the Christian music this year.

Lyric from “The Jig is Up”:

“Your eyes see further than mine

I can see as far as the sun and moon in the sky…

I’ll wait for your words

I’ll trust, You’ll say!”

#2 MuteMath – “Armistice”

Labels: Rock, Christian, Groovin’

Do I have to tell you why this album is awesome? For the two people that don’t own it, just go take a little listen on iTunes.

Lyric from “Spotlight”

“Because everyone would rather watch you fall

(And we all fall, we all fall)

Just take a fall, you’re one of us -

The spotlight is on!”

#1 mewithoutYou – “Brother, Sister”

Label: Complex sound and lyrics, biting lyrics, Christian, hard(er) rock

Welcome to the perfect christian rock album – intricate rock compositions and un-matched lyrical complexity (which the listener must untangle at times). Altogether, this album tells a story from the perspective of a shipwrecked guy and his musings on life. The whole thing has this ‘swashbuckling’ feel. With this constant theme, each song sounds wholly different and engages deep, complex issues of faith, sin and praise. Most of the time they’re rocking out, but you must listen to the lyrics! They are downright cutting while still complex. You won’t hear ‘praise Jesus’, but listen close cause most songs talk about God’s character in some way.

The whole album’s lyrics flow together just like the music – the first song announces “I do not exist… if ever you come near/ I’ll hold up high a mirror/ Lord I could never show you anything as beautiful as you”; to the last song, repeating “I do not exist, only You exist.” I had to look up a lot of the lyrics beccause he sings fast at times, but it’s worth it to see the complexity they put into their songs.

Lyric from “A Glass Can Only Spill What it Contains”

“Like peacocks wandering the walkways of the zoo

Who have twice the autonomy the giraffes and tigers do

Saying:

"No one can stop me (no one stop me)

No one clips my claws!

now everyone watch me (everyone watch me)

Scale these outside walls!"

[Begin Rocking]

Oh you pious and profane, put away your praise and blame!

A glass can only spill what it contains!

To the perpetually plain, to the incurably inane

A glass can only spill what it contains!

What new mystery is this?

What blessed backwardness??

The Immeasurable One is held and does not resist!

Struck by wicked words and foolish fists of senseless men

The Almighty One does not defend!”

Or another favorite from “In a Sweater Poorly Knit”:

“You’re a door without a key, a field without a fence.

You made a wholly fool of me and I’ve thanked you ever since…

But if I’m a crown without a king, if I’m a broken open seed

If I come without a thing, then I come with all I need.”

New

2010-01-01T17:30:00.001-06:00

New years resolutions are an interesting thing. From them, I see our desire that we are seeking: a fresh start.

There's nothing mystical about Jan 1st. We could actually go on a diet or learn to be nicer to people any day of the year! So why wait until this one day? And then, we never fail to complete these resolutions, right? Yet each year, we make more promises... So, why do we do this?

I think I know why. We want a fresh start. We've messed up somehow this past year, so its time to start things right. Not only do we want a fresh start, but we want a good one, a perfect one. We don't want to 'sort of' stop drinking pop, but we want to do it perfectly, completely.

So, why do we have this desire to obtain a perfect, fresh start?

"Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come." (2 Cor. 5:17)

"He opened a new and living way for us through the curtain, that is, through his flesh" (Heb. 10:20)

Starting the new year with new resolutions reflects our desire to become a new (and later perfect) creation. And, becoming new doesn't have to happen only one day a year, but continues everyday!

"For you have delivered my soul from death,
Indeed my feet from stumbling,
So that I may walk before God
In the light of the living." (Ps. 56:13)

Bryce

Christmas 2009

2009-12-31T19:15:00.004-06:00

Christmas has been good. Very good.

My grandfather was selling some old lenses he had for his old FILM SLR. I managed to talk him out of two lenses:

Tamron 20-40mm f/2.8-3.5

Tamron 28-300mm f/3.5-6.3

So, I've been playing around with them, to say the least. Here's the first batch, more later.

Happy New Year's!

-Bryce

Bryce v. The Draining Battery

2009-11-04T20:22:00.001-06:00

Come children, and let me tell you the tale

Of the battery that was not all well.

Instead of purring, like a small kitten

Bryce’s car started like a dog, bitten;

For, under the hood, there lived a small beast;

Upon the battery, he loved to feast.

For many weeks, Bryce went out with cables,

But each time, returned fazed and unable.

He called on his prudent, parental allies,

To help him escape a certain demise.

With new unknown ideas, fresh in his head,

He thought and concentrated, then went to bed.

He came out early the very next morn’

And readied for battle, his mind reformed.

But as he approached the fiend’s lair,

His heart turned to stone, to his great despair

The monster had taken control of the locks,

And hidden himself down under the shocks!

Defeated again, Bryce left in a race,

And hurried toward home, to solve his case.

Finally, he sought out wise man Google;

Who he knew, rightly, to be no such fool.

“You must seek Expert Auto Electric

If you wish for your car again to tick.”

So, Bryce went and found this very strange place,

Who knew of some with a similar case.

Carlos, the leader, came out with his tools,

But the coward beast thought all of them fools.

Still, Carlos came at it, all full of smarts,

And he wounded the beast into two parts!

Seeing defeat, right now before its eyes,

The beast hid deeper, down in the dark lines.

Again came Carlos, with pliers in twos,

Checking each and every single fuse.

The beast was found among the power-locks,

But croaked quickly upon Carlos’ knock.

Therefore, the battery-beast being slain,

Bryce leaped in the air, but only in vain.

For brave Carlos, having destroyed the beast,

Now wanted his money, for fine treats.

So Bryce paid up, ecstatic with cheer,

Since the beast was gone meant nothing to fear.

So, What’s Going on Now?

2009-10-31T21:00:00.000-05:00

Right now, we are in the midst of Robinson Crusoe. The book makes people pretty polarized – and I’m on the side that loves it. Most of what I love is how Defoe writes. He wrote when English was used properly, and doesn’t go easy on the reader with his long, complex sentences. Still, I love it.

I’m working this weekend at the Timbers. It’s really cool to work the retreats right there alongside the full time staff. In fact, it’s hard to think of it like ‘work’. More like serving and playing in good fun. If that’s work, let me know where you can do that!

Next week we’re going on a trip. We don’t know where.

In other news, I’m in love with the band mewithoutyou. You need to listen to their album Brother, Sister. The entire album is told from the perspective of a shipwrecked guy and has this ‘rock-piratey’ feel all throughout. Also, it’s all about his lyrics – the man is a fine wordsmith. So, here’s a few lyrics, but really, they are just the tip!

“If ever you come near I'll hold up high a mirror,

Lord, I could never show you anything as beautiful as You”

“what good is each good thing we think we do?”

“Shadow am I!

Like a suspicion that's never confirmed

But it's never denied.

Wolf am I,

no, "shadow" - I think - is better

cause I'm not something - more like the absence of something -

So SHADOW AM I!”

“you're a door-without-a-key, a field-without-a-fence

you made a holy fool of me and I've thanked you ever since.

…

but if I'm a crown without a king, if I'm a broken open seed

if I come without a thing, then I come with all I need

no boat out in the blue, no place to rest your head,

the trap I set for you seems to have caught my leg instead!

I do not exist

Only You exist”

Those last words have been on my mind a ton during the forge. I do not exist, only You exist.

The Covenant

2009-10-31T20:59:00.000-05:00

Okay, so, the Covenant is a major part of the Forge. As a group, of 24 guys and girls, we had to come up with rules regarding how we will relate to different topics such as media, the outside world, alcohol, etc. All of the rules we created were not because these things are inherently bad, but we chose to not partake in a lot of things so that we could focus on each other as well as other important things while we are in the Forge. This being said, you should know some things that I won’t be doing along with my Forge class until May 1. We decided to only listen to not watch any television, not watch any movies, only listen to christian music, not drink alcohol or smoke tobacco, not do any Forge work on Sundays, and not date each other or resident staff. Again, none of these things are bad, but for each one we have a specific reason. For instance, we are not only choosing to not watch TV to rid ourselves of distractions, but we also decided to challenge one another by forcing us to change how we relate to our families, and friends when we go home. Trust me, we’ve had hours of discussion about each of these topics.

That being said, we’ve been ‘practicing’ the covenant for two weeks now. It was hard at first, but now it’s easy to follow. It was tough when I went home, but I looked at it as a challenge. I think I was able to communicate with my family much better by not watching TV.

So, yeah… that’s the covenant.

The First Two Months Real Fast!

2009-10-31T20:56:00.001-05:00

· First two weeks – introductory; lots of getting to know names; ropes training*
· Began Covenant meetings (see next post).
· Knocked over a huge, dead tree… found baby squirrels living there… [bad times]
· Started P2 in the mornings… [soreness]
· Started classes.
· Began reading Life Together.
· We went somewhere.
· More classes, more assignments.
· Finished Life Together.
· I’ve worked 4 weekends so far – 1 conference, 3 retreats [tons of fun!]
· Went home this weekend for med school interview at MU!
· Visited Rolla for about 3 hours after said med school interview.
· Finished Covenant. (see next post)
Yeah, that pretty much covers it.
*NOTE: I hate heights, but ropes training mitigated a lot of that fear. Did you know a zip tether’s breaking strength was around 10,000 pounds?

Here at the Forge…

2009-10-31T20:55:00.000-05:00

Everything is perfect. All right, that’s not true, but it’s also not far off.

When I was at Rolla, I was always looking for time to just get away from the busy-ness of life to really think about what was important, to learn more about myself, and dig into the Bible. But, school always disrupted my thoughts, breaking them up. However, the Forge focuses time for each of these subjects and more. Thus, I’ve really enjoyed the first two months here.

Now, I can’t just talk about anything here, since we are sworn to secrecy by Matt (the director). So, I’m going to be bluntly vague sometimes, and you’re just gonna have to deal with it! But really, if you’re seriously considering doing the Forge, just don’t read this… it’ll be much more fun that way!

365days

2009-08-01T14:11:00.001-05:00

Just wanted to let anyone who reads this know about a little project I've been doing. It's called 365days - basically, you take a creative self-portrait everyday for a year. You can check out my pics so far here on flickr.

365days

The News

2009-07-30T21:46:00.004-05:00

The news scares me. It frightens me in a big-picture way, for two reasons. The first, less important, lies in what the media calls "news." By following what is news, we can see what is important (at least what the media thinks is important) to our society. All I hear now is about the Jonas Brothers, the Hills, finding blame for Michael Jackson's death, or another celebrity's latest mishap. Some of the things that make the headlines... c'mon!

The other thing that worries me is scarier. With every story of a horrific act, I wonder what would have to happen where people would say, "This is it. This is the final straw of hope in our values." Would it be a murder? A rape? A war? What would it have been one hundred, two hundred years ago? Imagine explaining to a revolutionary war fighter why we had to drop a bomb which killed 75,000 people instantly in Hiroshima. He would spit in our face and tell us we've lost our moral compass. Then, we'd tell him about Nagasaki...

What scares me the most is when I try and think about the most horrific act that could ever be done by man - I can't come up with anything that hasn't been done. Are we holding on to a sinking ship? Are we past the point of no return? Are we, as a whole, beyond redemption?

------------------------

On an unrelated note (really, it's unrelated), check out this video.

The Fire

-----------------------

Bryce

Summer Plans

2009-07-27T18:49:00.002-05:00

Summer is two-thirds over already, so I'm going to take a look at a list I put together while in school of what I wanted to accomplish this summer.

-Exercise- check. Off and on at times, but definitely a check.

-Work-check. Thank goodness.

-God - semi-check... it's been a tough summer in this area.

-Tint off car - check! I totally de-tinted my car!

-get rid of crap - check. Did this the first week.

-visit Texas - check! Just did this!

-organize basement - no check. Haven't gotten there yet...

-save money - check. This is hard.

-read lots of books - sorta check. 1.9 books down.

-walk dog - check! Unfortunately, Pluto is getting very old now. He has arthritis and can't go for long walks...

Well look at that. About 8 more checks than I would have imagined. Still, a few more things are necessary:

-buy Forge books- bargain hunting!

-visit Rolla- freshman week baby!

-medical school applicationing - sent off the first round, waiting for the second round.

The summer ain't over yet. But, August always seems to fly by. Well, let's hope it does, cause I can't wait for the Forge!

Bryce

"Love - it's the last transmission" ~ MAE

Watch This Space

2009-06-03T00:41:00.001-05:00

I'm feeling fiesty... mmm. So, watch out for some new posts coming up here.

Bryce

The Best Song Ever

2009-01-16T09:19:00.006-06:00

It'll change your life.

"Help me out here" by the Cobalt Season
(you can listen to it here - help me out here

Rain falling down on my face
Wash me clean, wash my sins away
Take me back where I used to run
Fast and free like the kingdom come

Like the kingdom come

Still we go marching on blood on our hands
Dirt on our skin, heads in the sand
In some other town or in the here and now
How far where we go all that we allow

Help me out here, I'm getting tired
Help me out here, I'm getting tired

And pardon me, if I say too muhc
I could never ignore that which i ought not touch
Curiosity might be all I got and some cynicsym from experienced rut
Cause my experience brought me here

They say we must go on, never looking back
Lest we ever learn the wisdom that we lack
Curiosity, it might be my death
Though I may stop from time to time to catch my breath

Would you help me out here? I'm getting tired.
Help me out here, I'm getting tired.

And all that we need to see, and all those we need to hear
We tie their hands behind their backs and look away

Yes we tear the shirts right off their backs
And then donate cash for all they lack
Fancy ourselves philanthropists
Save justice for another day

And we wonder how we got so far
Making money off each others scars
"Still it's never my fault, I mean what other options did I have?"

Buying someone else's tyrannic dream Of force and greed and foolish schemes When there is light to help illuminate the way? Still we choose to tell each other lies That this kingdom could never be realized The master never could of meant the words he said...

I'm getting tired.

Where do we go from here? God only knows.
Perhaps that's just some bullshit spiritual prose.
Perhaps we're the ones, we've been waiting for.

Perhaps God has just been waiting at our door.
He's waiting at the door.

I'll try to be the first to tell you when I'm wrong
Write a book about it right here in my song.

Here is where I start to try and start again
Learning to become father and a friend.

Would you help me out here? I'm getting tired.

Zenhabits.net

2008-11-10T20:53:00.003-06:00

If you're like me, life comes at you fast with different obstacles. Tests, lab reports, projects, meetings... But, this website here has some great tips on staying on top of it all. There are posts ranging from simplicity to motivation. It's a site I check regularly and have gotten a lot out of. For instance, I just read a post about anti-multitasking - focusing on one thing until it's done. Good stuff.

Maturity?

2008-11-07T08:32:00.007-06:00

I'm not entirely convinced the world likes 'mature' people. People who can wake up early and get things done right. The guys who save their money instead of getting that new TV. Even in my head, I am pushed away by these people. They're not the life of a party and won't be seen in any funny YouTube videos. In today's culture, it seems like maturity is something we're all expected to grow into, but we have no one to model it.

Now, I am far from an expert in maturity. But, I know the Bible calls us to maturity. While I don't even have a nice, clean definition of the word, I think I have some ideas it's based around.

The first thing is being content. You can't be mature without some level of contentedness. It usually happens one day when you realize you're spreading yourself too thin. I wanted (and still do...) to be a great artist, photographer, doctor, friend, movie-maker, writer, and have a kickin' girlfriend. Oh, and get all A's at Rolla so I can go to Med School. But, when I went through and did some prioritizing, Med School trumped all these things. If I wanted to grow into who I wanted to be, Med School had to be the main focus. I had to realize that all the other things I do are great and fun, but some of it had to be cut out so I could grow into schoolwork. I had to be content with getting A's in classes, and not becoming the next Speilberg, Van Gogh, writer for the Office, or Ansel Adams.

From my experiences, the second part of maturity comes from discipline. Oooh... what a terrible word! How about we call it a routine, or a direction. Over the past week, I've been realizing the value of having a routine. I specifically set aside some time to get through some lab reports (instead of doing them the night before at 11 pm), and I realized just how much time I have! The worst part of the routine isn't making a schedule, but following through. This can't happen with any cheap advice or words, but has to come from a greater motivation (at least for me). Some days it happens, and some days it doesn't. This whole process grows you into maturity.

Now, this isn't the complete story for maturity, but at least I got my few cents of experience out there.

Also, I have a challenge. But, it's not to you, my great mass of readers, but to myself. I am going to try to post something once a day! Not only will this help my writing, force me to have a routine, but posting everyday means that I can see if this dumb thing really matters to me. Cause if it doesn't, it's gotta go!

Bryce

My Favorite Anberlin Song

2008-11-04T11:54:00.002-06:00

(...maybe even my theme song)

Burn Out Brighter

Live, I wanna live inspired
Die, I wanna die for something

Facing towards the heavens
I fell into a pitch black
I'm moments from landing and I'm shaking like a heart attack

Is the time, can I turn back
I've made mistakes in the past
Need a chance, can't take it back
Wish I could set things right tonight

Live, I wanna live inspired
Die, I wanna die for something higher than myself
Live and die for anyone else
The more I live I see this life's not about me

All I know spins out of control
Wonder what's next for heart and soul
Nothing I earned can save me now
Hearing one day be my final hour

Is the time, can I turn back
I've made mistakes in the past
Need a chance, can't take it back
Wish I could set things right tonight

Live, I wanna live inspired
Die, I wanna die for something higher than myself
Live and die for anyone else
The more I live I see this life's not about me

Don't wanna leave this world knowing I preach in vain
Looked out for myself, so sorry so ashamed
Don't wanna leave this life knowing I barely tried
Chased all my dreams that I can't weigh on the inside

Live, I wanna live on fire
Die, I wanna burn out brighter
Brighter than the Northern lights
Wanna live to feel the daylight
The more I live I see that this life's not about me

More posts coming soon...!

B

The best days are the ones where you're missing your pants at some point... unless you live somewhere cold, or you're homeless.

2008-09-10T23:48:00.008-05:00

Something was different about today. But, before I start the story, I have to let you know how the day started. I began reading Romans today and I couldn't get the first line out of my head. Please, before you put me off as an awesome christian, understand that I haven't read my bible regularly in almost a month. I haven't opened it in a few weeks. I'm not a 'good' christian.

Anyways, Paul calls himself 'a bond servant of Christ Jesus, called as an apostle, set apart for the gospel of God...' The part that struck me the hardest was the last part - set apart for the gospel of God. When I read this, I ask myself what would happen if that was my purpose - I am set apart for the gospel of God. What if sharing and living out the gospel was my only intention in life? Wow. Anyways, so I was chewing on that bit for the rest of the day...

Physical Chemistry II, Intermediate Quantitative Analysis, and Molecular Genetics slipped by. I was so tired. I almost fell asleep once for every letter in those class names. (I did stay up late and get up early).

But, I wasn't worried about these classes, I was worried about what lied ahead at 1:00.

I had a lab for P-Chem. But, out of five groups, me and my partner were the lucky group to start out with zero information and design an experiment to figure out a reaction rate. If you don't understand where to begin from this, then you're in my shoes.

We gave a presentation the week before about how we were going to perform the experiment (we had no idea what to do), and the teacher ripped us apart with a few specific questions. I wasn't looking forward to this lab at all.

We ended up finding a part of an experiment online that we hoped to get working. So, we went into the lab, hoping to work something out. Now, I could go into some chemistry methods and such, but I won't do that. Very simply, we got the experiment to work, but it was running too fast. So, me and Brian worked out some math, and figured out how to make it run slower. And it did! Then, we tried to speed it up, and again we succeeded! I guess I've always had my doubts in chemistry, never thinking I was 'good enough.' But, this lab today somehow proved to my doubting inner ego that yes, I can do chemistry (which is good, since I've been studying it for four years).

As I'm walking back from lab, on top of the world, I hear music coming from our neighboring house. I thought they were having a dance party or something, but no one was outside, or on the porch... then I saw five people on the roof including a violinist and a guitartist...

About three minutes later, I was up there too. Their roof is actually very comfortable if you lie down. And, something about being on a roof changes things. Maybe it's just because it's a whole new perception experience, or maybe it's because you feel superior to the peons below... I'm not sure.

I came back from across the street pretty content. I was so happy, I loaded up an episode of the Office that I downloaded for free. It was just about as close to perfection as I could get. I had a quesadilla on one plate, a cherry coke by my side, and my pants were missing. And, I watched the office to my heart's content. Amazing.

Then, our first gel group came along. I'm co-leading a group going through John 13-17 (the upper room discourse). Now, you may not know this, but I hate public speaking. I'm fine if I don't know I'll be in front of people, but once I'm there, knowing what's coming... I freak out. I've been trying to improve, trying to throw myself out there, but it's still hard.

So, I guess I was sort of dreading tonight. I was basing how this night would go off of how my last worry-wrought one was. Anyways, it ended up going really well. We didn't run out of stuff to say, no awkward moments happened, and I got to know all the people in our group. I know I'm not Larry King now or anything, but it's a nice step forward.

So, that's been my day. But, it's important not to forget where it all started. I know I won't.

Bryce

“If you read history you will find that the Christians who did the most for the present world were precisely those who thought most of the next. It is since Christians have largely ceased to think of the other world that they have become so ineffective in this.” ~C.S. Lewis

[Maybe one of these days I'll put up a post that isn't as serious. I've realized lately though that I really like things that have some sort of meaning in all parts of them, especially movies. So, I guess I put a lot of thought into the things I do.]

Check this:

The Irresistible Revolution

2008-07-27T10:21:00.002-05:00

"Too often we just do what makes sense to us and ask God to bless it. In the Beatitudes, God tells us what God blesses - the poor, the peacemakers, the hungry, those who mourn, those who show mercy - so we should not ask God's blessing on a declaration that we will have no mercy on evildoers (war). We know all too well that we have a God who shows mercy on evildoers, for if he didn't, we'd all be in big trouble, and for that, this evildoer is very glad. Rather than do what makes sense to us and ask God's blessing, we'd do better to surround ourselves with those whom God promises to bless, and then we need not ask God's blessing. It's just what God does."

~Shane Clairborne, the Irresistible Revolution

This book teaches me about living a way of life following the Prince of Peace. It's teaching me about compassion, and not to sit around and wait for things to change. It's a book about love without human boundaries. And, I'm only halfway through!

Da Hairs

2008-05-23T22:52:00.006-05:00

Before:

During:
My dad had never done this before. We were using my brother's hair clippers.
"Oops" says Dad.
"What do you mean 'oops?!'"

I should have left it like this:

No one will notice, right?

Before/After.

Oh, the things I do for Pine Cove...

-B

Saw this on Postsecret Today

2008-05-18T22:12:00.001-05:00

I thought it was fitting since I've said 'goodbye' to a lot of college friends who I won't see for a while.

M U S I C

2008-05-07T22:59:00.004-05:00

I know, I know, posting song lyrics is getting old. It's so 2005, not 2008. So, let me take a second to explain why I continue to do so.

I love music. There is so much communication when you listen to a song. There are so many aspects of the song that can effect your feelings. So, my analytical mind wants to dissect it... but I won't let it. Not here. But, here's what I think can convey information from music: lyrics, tempo, key, repeated patterns, crescendos... Doesn't sound too inspiring when listed like this, but it truly does amaze me. I mean really, why does a certain set of notes produce a "minor key" and no matter what you do it's gonna sound sad? How does that happen?! I also love how a person can pick and choose from all of these things to convey a message to the listener. It's pretty fascinating... anyways, here's another.

"Listening to Freddy Mercury" by Emery

Every once in a while I think I'm lying.
Take it to the bank. I believe every word I say.
(This just isn't how, this just isn't how)
Then again this is when you start your prying.
(This just isn't how, this just isn't how)
But there's a thought it could be true.
But this just isn't how I imagined it would be.
With these random people just asking the most personal things.
And to think that somehow I could always come clean.
And you shake your head just like you know what I mean.

You're a Christian tell the sinner find repentance it's your last chance.
You believer, where's your patience?
Answer questions, put on faces.
What about God? For you and for me.

All have fallen short (To see if it's right or wrong to listen to this song.
I don't want you too. To see if you're okay with all the words I say.
It can't be this way)

Somehow, someone is more equal than others.
Depending on the words we choose to say.
A glance at her too long tonight.
But everything I am saying is right in your ears.

We are all the sisters and the brothers.
Until we find we don't believe the same, like...

Gary is getting drunk to forget Sarah.
Sarah is stealing money from her parents.
Aaron is lying straight to Jon.
About Megan and the things that went on.
Jessica is a gossip, Laura is a slut.
Derrick hits Bridget and Ben deals drugs.
Seth spends all his money gambling.
Joey stopped praying.

It is all the same thing.
We are all the same people.
With sinning hearts that make us equal.

Here is my hand, not words said desperately.
It is not our job to make anyone believe.

Tisbury Lane

2008-05-01T08:50:00.005-05:00

Why did MAE never release this on their big albums? Second best song by MAE in my book.

"She greets the day with her hair wet
She asks them to vacate the building
Because she's got a plan they don't know yet
And if it goes wrong, there'll be no one to see

If she could just get the word out
God knows she's trying
They're watching her with eyes closed
She's always stuck with the old route
Does anyone knock when they barge in to beat her down?

Will you come back?
It's all she wants to know
She knows she's part of the problem too
Could she let it go?
It'd take a miracle
So that's what I'm praying for

No one can know just how she feels
She won't use the phone, she's too tired to pick it up
She's going back to the old way
She sits in the classroom to learn with the others

Please don't give up when it's easy
Don't you know that me and Jesus will cheer you on?
He's the only one that will be constantly everything you need

Will you come back?
It's all she wants to know
She knows she's part of the problem too
Could she let it go?
It'd take a miracle
So that's what I'm praying for

Yeah
She lives on Tisbury Lane"

I was on the Avalanche

2008-04-28T00:11:00.010-05:00

It's funny how you can go for so long without having a break, and then all good things rush in at once.

Last weekend, I helped my (basically) brother, Smedvig, propose to his girlfriend. Well, I didn't help as much as I filmed it. Same thing, though, right? I've never really seen a proposal before, so I was a little skeptical. But, I am very thankful that he invited me to be there for the big question. I left their church soaked in joy from their radiant happiness. It was nice to have the night before I toook the MCAT.

I took a test last Saturday that I had studied for every day for 90 days. April 19th... I will not forget that day. In the midst of the MCAT, I was not seeing the light. But, when I walked out of there and gave a high five to a girl I will never see again, the light poured in. The pressure sloughed off, and clarity came through.

That night, I met up with an old friend, Mr. Andrew Nash. He just proposed to his girlfriend. At Starbucks, we talked for a good 3 hours. It was what I needed after the test, just time to relax and catch up with humorous stories. The best part? He asked me to be his best man for his wedding! He didn't plan this, but the wedding is January 3rd... important day (for me). Needless to say, sleep came easy.

When I came back to Rollasponsibilites, another surprise was waiting. Mark Smedvig asked me to be his best for a wedding on Dec. 27th! Of course, I was honored and accepted. So, the end of December/beginning of January is going to be a crazy exciting time.

On top of all of this, I've had some time to take a lot of pictures. I thought I'd relay some up here...

Dismantle. Repair.

2008-03-19T00:49:00.004-05:00

Tonight, my room was discussing Colossians 3 for our room meeting (we're going through colossians). We took away something pretty cool from it.

Colossians 3:5 says to put to death immorality, impurity, lust... greed. As my room discussed what this practically looks like, we noticed that a lot of these things slowly fall away without hard work. I have never sat down and really thought, "How can I be less greedy today?", but today I am much less greedy than before I followed Christ. So, we decided that this was proof that God works to restore us everyday, and sometimes we don't even notice!

In verse 8, some more habits are mentioned such as anger, slander, etc. Again, we all agreed that some of these things fall away themselves. One of my favorite verses is 1 Peter 5:10 - It basically confirms that God will restore us- "perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish". I love this reminder because it inspires hope. Day by day, God is working on us, breaking down, even "putting to death" our faults, and He is building up new habits, thoughts and ways in all of us.

Reminds me of a great song by Anberlin

"Save me from myself
Save me from myself
Help me
Save me from myself
Save me from myself
Oh, woah
Things are gonna change now
For the better
And woah, oh
Things are gonna change

Hands like secrets are the hardest thing to keep from you
Lines and phrases like knives
Your words can cut me through
Dismantle me down Repair
You've dismantled me
You've dismantled me"
~Dismantle. Repair.

On a completely different note, I have to tell you about postsecret.com. Basically, people send in their secrets on postcards to this guy, and he posts them on the web. Some are big, some are almost pointless, some are sad and others are hilarious. It's a way to find release, I guess, but I like to read them just to know that people deal with the same things I do. I found this one that I could have made myself:

But, a word of caution before you get too excited - most cards are very real and shocking, so be prepared for anything.

Have a wonderful wednesday,
B ryce

This post isn't a cop-out or a filler, there was a lot of thought put into it; it's a great reminder, or even better, a great thing to never forget.

2008-03-07T09:40:00.004-06:00

Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy;
without holiness no one will see the Lord.

Hebrews 12:14

Sidewalks in the Snow

2008-02-21T12:47:00.002-06:00

Life is like walking on sidewalks in the snow.
The only way to see if you're still on the sidewalk is to look back and study your footprints.

Necessary Nonsensicality.

2008-02-17T20:22:00.011-06:00

I needed a lighter post.

I did no work on Saturday.

I did a ton today.

The MoMiner made me risk the weather to snap some pictures of Lions Club Park.

This one's for me. (and, I guess for you too now)

Also, I guess I'm crazy, but I cut my finger today, and I really wanted a picture of it. So, here's two.

AND

It's ok. You can think it. I like to be different.

-bryce

How long should it take somebody
Before they can be someone?

Cause I know there's got to be another level,
Somewhere closer to the other side
And, I'm feeling like it's now or never
Can I break the spell of the typical?
~Mutemath (Typical)

5-4-07

2008-02-15T00:05:00.005-06:00

I found some really inspiring words from...myself. I wrote all last spring semester and had forgotten about what had happened and what was going on until I read some old notebook. I found this entry encouraging (who would think you could encourage yourself?).

It's dated 5-4-07

"I can feel a change coming. A sobering change. I think I'm going to grow up. Yeah, that sounds cheesy, but it's time.

I want to live for God? Well, it's time to get serious, cling to His promises, and start doing it. It's time to start communicating with people for real.

I want to be a doctor? It's time to study. Time to memorize. Time to get serious.

It's time to be there for people, help them through this life. It's time to be honest, time to think about the effects of my decisions. "A life with meaning can't exist with a life with happiness". I think God has made it possible. I need to start showing some joy. Start smiling more. Stop complaining. Be there.

I need to "embrace life". I have to stop thinking about what people think of me. I have to start thinking about what God thinks of me.

It's time to do things- not because I want to, but because I'm called to, or must do for others. It's time to let the video games go. Time to let lust go. Time to stop making excuses, and be the guy. It's time for action.

-Bryce

PS
I think, although people won't admit it, people look on Christians and judge our standards. Now, why do they care if we mess up? If there is no God, then what we do should not matter to them. But, it does. When they need someone, they see God in us and trust. I think."

Did I grow up?

"For your salvation I wait, Oh Lord." Genesis 49:18